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when the party's over - billie eilish
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"Don't you know I'm no good for you, I've learned to lose you, can't afford to Tore up my shirt to stop you bleedin' But nothin' ever stops you leavin'
You glanced up at the now cracked mirror, blood sliding down your knuckles traveling to your wrists. Tears streamed down your face as your chest puffs in and out. He finally left.
Hell, you weren't surprised he left, you were just curious if when he was going to. You didn't think you'd find out about him leaving from Veronica Lodge. The back of your hand wipes the sweat of your forehead moving your Y/H/C hair out of the way. Your eyes didn't glisten it shine as much as they used to. They gloss over with more salty droplets of sadness as the memory comes back to you.
"Veronica slow down." You stammered holding her tan shoulders, "What are you talking about?"
Veronica took a deep breath closing her eyes, "Jughead Y/N, he's with Betty."
Your eyebrows raised, "Of course he's with Betty? They're working on a Blue and Gold article."
"No-No baby he's like, dating Betty." Veronica whispered holding your cheek in her soft palm,
You shook your head in denial, "How do you know? How would you know?"
Veronica sighed pulling out her phone, "Are you sure you want to se this?"
You nodded eagerly taking her phone from her hand.
The way his hands felt around your waist, the way his black curl would press against your forehead, all of that was ripped away from you from the perfect girl next door. The way her blonde ponytail was perfectly curled, the smile that she wore that could brighten anyone's day, that was the girl who stole your everything.
You looked up, your eyes meeting the ceiling above you. Your sight became fuzzy, your arms started to shake, you felt sick. The pill bottle fell from your hands, the title floor now covered in small blue beads. Your hand clenched your blue tank top, your knees buckled meeting the ground.
"Why-Why is she doing this?" You sniffles looking at Veronica,
Her sad gaze, she shook her head, "I don't know, you should talk to him."
You raced to the blue and gold room ramming the door open, there they were. Betty's hands wrapped around his neck, her soft pastel pink glossed lips pressed against it. Their heads snapped in your direction as you shook your head,
"I really-really wanted Veronica to be wrong." You murmured,
Jughead flung from Betty's body to the wall, "Y/N I-I"
You rolled your eyes, "You what Jughead? You kissed Betty, you had a secret relationship with her behind my back? Don't worry, I don't want the scraps from that. I don't want the leftovers from the girl next door who seems to have everything, even a broken girl's boyfriend? Who knew, the perfect Elizabeth Cooper had the guts to date a guy who she knew had a girlfriend! Imagine the rumors, the posts? There was NOTHING you two could've done to hurt me worse than this. You knew what I was doing to myself Elizabeth, you knew too Jughead. So thank you, thank you for making me realize that I am worth NOTHING. That I don't deserve anything, that I will always have nothing, Thank you for making reality so much easier for me."
Betty's lip quivered as she stepped closer to you, "Y/N listen to me."
You scoffed, "Me listen to you? That's not how thsi works Betty, you aren't allowed to feel sad about this. You caused this, the both of you did."
"It wasn't her fault Y/N it was mine." Jughead pleases grabbing your hand,
You tore your hand from his, "Don't fucking touch me Jones. Of course, you'd stand up to your girlfriend who caught you cheating, when it was you in fault."
The both of them went silent as you wiped your eyes, "Leave, Leave me alone."
You rushed out of the room leaving Betty and Jughead, guilt and sadness washed over the both of them.
Your body collapsed onto the cold tile floor, your eyes flickered to your bloody hand and back to your scar induced legs. Jughead wasn't the reason you did this, he was partly the reason for why you were feeling the way you were but it wasn't the whole story.
You were raped, he thought you were lying about it. Your father raped you, then got arrested. Jughead still didn't believe you, trying to convince him was tiring. So you stopped. Jughead had always wondered why you would hurt yourself, why you acted the way you did. It was for that exact reason, he was just too oblivious to see it.
Quiet when I'm coming home and I'm on my own I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that
Whenever you came home from school, you'd have to act like you were fine to not worry your siblings and mother. You didn't want to bother them, your Mom was stressed and overworked due to your father being arrested. Your older sister had to move back in to help with more money income, and your little brother, god is he only knew what was happening.
You never felt happy, you were just good at putting on a front. The smile that you wore, hid a broken girl who could never be repaired. The sweaters, hid scars that were caused by herself and her father.
You would smile, saying it's okay. Veronica, Jughead, and Archie were the only ones who knew what you would hide. But now, Archie and Jughead were slowly fading away. Veronica was the only one who was ever there anymore, but working at Pops took more time away from you guys ranting and hanging out.
Don't you know too much already I'll only hurt you if you let me Call me friend but keep me closer (Call me back) And I'll call you when the party's over
Your body twitched, your head becoming swimmy. Your fingers wrapped around your palm, your eyes caught a glimpse of the bathroom door opening. Before everything went black.
But nothing is better sometimes Once we've both said our goodbyes Let's just let it go Let me let you go
Sometimes, someone hurts you so bad, that it stops hurting.
2:07 AM, that was the time the doctors announced your death.
No one was the same, nothing was the same. After that day, everyone knew what Betty and Jughead done. Most people assumed they drove you to your death, but the core four were the only ones who truly knew what happened. Jughead told Betty about the rape, she scoffed and rolled her eyes. After all those eye rolls, who knew that the rolled you to your suicide.
But this, this death was true proof of something you'd always think about.
