Timeless Love (FlashxReader)

Chapter 7

Y/N took a moment for herself as she entered her and Barry's apartment, she saw that Barry hadn't changed a thing. Y/N couldn't believe that it had been over six months since she had last been there, it seemed like such an impossible notion, to be gone for that long without a trace.

Barry noticed that Y/N seemed distracted, or lost in thought, and truth be told, he was just happy to have her back, the rest of the world could wait, because he finally got the love of his life back in his arms, he got the win he deserved.

He gently grabbed her hand and led her upstairs, pulling her from her thoughts as they entered their bedroom. Y/N walked into her closet and saw everything just as she had left it. She changed into one of Barry's old flannel shirts which was more of a dress on her before she sat down on their bed. 

Barry sat down on the bed beside Y/N as they both slipped under the covers, ready for a good night's rest. Barry quickly shut off the bedside lamp before Y/N snuggled into his side, a feeling that Barry had missed so desperately, he instinctively wrapped his arms around her before falling asleep, finally, with the person he loved most back with him again.

Though Y/N and Barry's peaceful sleep didn't last long, later that same night Y/N jolted awake, out of breath as her eyes had a look of fear written all over them.

Barry woke up almost immediately, "Y/N?" he asked softly. "It was just a dream," he told her, he could see the panic in her eyes, even in the dark room.

Y/N shook her head, putting her head in her hands as she sat up with her knees to her chest. "It wasn't a dream, it was a nightmare, a memory more specifically," she explained, wiping away her tears.

Barry slowly pulled Y/N's hands away from her face, "What happened? You can tell me..."

Y/N sighed, "I remember it, all of it," she told him, her eyes still refusing to meet his. "My time in the speed force, I remember every moment of it. I remember seeing all of my memories of you and the team, everyone...just fading away before they were gone when I was merging with the speed force, I didn't have any control."

Barry looked down as Y/N turned and cried into his shoulder, Barry wrapped his arms around her tightly as he pulled her into his lap.  "Shh," Barry cooed. "It's okay, you're okay now, I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

Y/N sniffled as she buried her head in Barry's chest, her fingers gently messing with the ends of his shirt. "When I came back, all of those memories came rushing back, after that the next thing I remember is saving you, I remember finally being home again," she added. "But now I can't stop thinking about all the hurt I put you through, all the time that you spent here without me-"

"Stop," Barry interrupted softly. "You didn't do anything to me...if you want someone to blame, blame Devoe. He is the one who really caused all of this, not you," Barry told Y/N. "You gotta stop blaming yourself for something that was out of your control."

Y/N didn't see how that was even possible, but she knew, that maybe in time things would get better, easier. Barry continued to hold Y/N close, not quite ready to let her go just yet. Y/N rested her head against his chest as she calmed down slowly.

"Please don't leave me," Y/N spoke after a few minutes had passed. "I don't know what I would do without you," she told him.

"I'm not going anywhere," Barry replied. "Ever," he added, lifting Y/N's chin and bringing her eyes to his own as he gazed down at her lovingly. "I'm always going to be here for you, you just say the word and I'll be right by your side in an instant," he said cupping her cheek in his hand.

Barry leaned down slowly before capturing Y/N in a kiss. He gently coaxed Y/N to lay down with him, she nuzzled herself into Barry's side. "I love you," she murmured against him.

"I love you too," Barry replied as he slowly ran his hand up and down her back in an effort to soothe her.

Y/N eventually fell asleep with Barry, finally feeling at peace once more with him right by her side. Barry didn't fall back asleep, what Y/N had told him about her time in the speed force only made him regret sending her there. Barry also knew that what Y/N had told him only scratched the surface of what really happened.

The real question was, did Barry really want to know what Y/N had gone through? Could he bear that much pain?