Fight

P. Thirty five

LUNA
And post. A photo of me listening to some music on the plane, we're still flying to Russia. I'm exited to get back in the car again after a busy week. Allot of meetings, for new sponsors, but also did some interviews and some simulator work. Had to go to LA again, for some other stuff. I've filmed a commercial for Lays, it was fun. Now I'm here again. I look at my own profile on Instagram. It's all about f1, fuck. That's not what I wanted. Only this picture is not really about f1, but it also is because I'm on my way to Russia. The picture before it is from me and Nico made from the back. I need to learn how to make selfies. But soon I'll have some photos of shoot I've done.

With a big smile and a weird walk I quickly walk over to my grandpa. He made it. Tight we hug. 'Where is Sterre?' We let go and start walking.
'She is at home. Noel had chemo this weekend.'
'Oh.' He nods.
'I didn't wanted her here if he needs her more.' He nods again. I'm so happy he's here. I lock my arms with him. He's my best friend, my buddy.
'I missed you.' I smile.
'I missed you too, I wish you could be at races more often.'
'Me too.' It's quite for a second. 'I do wanna meet to man who makes my little girl happy.' My smile grows. They haven't met yet, that's bad. Two out of three favorite humans haven't met each other yet. They have crossed paths, but I never introduced them to each other. I don't know why.
'You will, he's walking right over there.' I don't point because that would be to obvious. But grandpa nods seeing him. 'How long do you think we can keep it quite.' Literally no one knows, apart from Charles, Kala. No clue who Daniel told it to.
'Long,' he says with confidence.
'Really?' He nods.
'Yeah. I see some flirting now and then, but that's because I know. You're keeping it pretty separate. As long as you're both wanna keep it silent, it will be fine.' I also think we'll keep things quite for a long while, but when we wanna start a family it will get hard of course. But we're not busy with that yet, we're waiting with that for a year or two. We talk about it sometimes, our future. Kids, a house, marriage. I love imagining and dreaming about the future.

'Sir thank you for being here.' My grandpa nods at the male. He's so cute. Holding the mic in front of him.
'You're welcome.' The conversation is in Dutch. My grandpa barely speaks English, he understands it, he just hates speaking the language. I don't know why.
'You're lucky, he hates being in front of the camera.' I smile. It's true. He doesn't even like photo taking of him. I dislike photos too, but he really hates it. Pictures is a part of my job.
'I feel honored. Are you proud of your granddaughter?' My grandpa his eyes start to shine.
'Intense proud. She's doing such a good job, ending up in the top 10. A future world champion right there.' I smile. Love my grandpa. Number 1 fan.
'They got you Vincent.' Helmut walks over to the table.
'I know but every thing for my Guusje,' they talk in German. I understood that a little.

***

'Luna you wanna have the talk now?' I already saw Helmut coming towards me. I'm finally gonna tell him why I became more distant. And to be honest now he asked me I'm started to become a little nervous.
'Yeah sure.' I get up. Yesterday I told him I wanted to have a talk with him, but I said when he had the time, because I'm not in that big of a rush. Those one or two days wouldn't matter. I follow him into his little office room. We both sit down.
'You wanted to tell me something?' I nod.
'Yes. I wanna thank you for the support all these last years.' Helmut and I get along well. 'Also when I got very distant all of a sudden in 2017. I didn't became distant for no reason.' I take a deep breath. Still it hits me. 'I was on vacation with my friends, we were planning on going out, but before we even entered a club I got pulled into a alley, two man sexually abused me. I took my distance from almost everyone, even my own family. I got scared of man, I knew I could trust you, but still I took my distance.' He gets up from his chair and opens his arms. I smile getting up too and wrap my arms around him, that's a bit of a surprise.
'I get it. I'm glad you told me.' Now I told him I think we're gonna get even closer than we were before. 'I'm sorry I didn't told you sooner, not allot of people know about it.'
'And I assume you wanna keep it that way.' I nod. Luckily he understands, not that I was expecting anything else. 'So who knows?' Good question.
'Family, some friends. At work not that many people, George, Kala, Sophia and you now.' We both take a seat again.
'You're not planning on telling everyone?' I shrug.
'I don't feel ready in some way to tell everyone. At least not the whole world. I think I'm ready to tell everyone when I can help, or support, people who has been through the same time. And I don't feel like I'm able to do that yet.' He nods in understanding.
'I'm not gonna push you in anyway, I'm keeping my mouth shut if you want me to.' I smile slowly nodding.
'Thank you Helmut.'
'Of course Luna. Give me another hug.' I smile. We hug again, I didn't knew he was much of a hug person. Helmut from the outside doesn't always seem that sweet, but he is.

'Someone touched me,' I say through the radio. Quickly I look in my mirror, a white colored car. Not able to overtake me. My car moves by its own. 'I have a flat tire.' Great. Fucking dick head.
'Yep, box, box, box. Take it easy.' I will take it easy. I wanna finish the race. For my grandpa. I have to do the hole third sector. This is gonna take long.

'You did good.' I sight in my grandpa his arms. Could've done better. If the plat tire never happened. But can't turn anything back now.
'Yeah it was alright.' He takes my hand between his hands.
'It's not your fault, I'm proud of you with every results, except crashes.' I smile. He texted me everyday, asking how I felt. 'You're my little girl. 2nd, 8th or 20th, I'm proud, everyone is, I am little more. You tried your hardest, more you can't do.' I kiss him before hugging him again.
'Thank you opa.'