aTRACKion

Chapter Forty Four

A lot can happen in a couple of months, and a lot has.

When Doug and I first found out that I was pregnant, the doctor confirmed a few days later that I was more than likely only about four weeks into my pregnancy. The excitement of knowing that our baby was only just beginning to grow inside of my tummy, was obviously overshadowed by the funeral of Doug's mum.

The service was so beautifully simple. It was a short service, that honoured the woman who was once not only a very loved and respected wife and mother, she was also a fondly remembered sister, aunt, friend, colleague and neighbour.

Everything about the funeral, was done with the thought of what Maude DiCarto would have wanted—the clothing she would be cremated in, roses from her garden, the music played, the poem that was read and the intimately small wake—Doug arranged it all with the loving thought of his mum behind every decision he had made.

I was proud of him on so many occasions that day.

He was courteous, brave, strong, considerate and obliging. Even though he was feeling so terribly sad on the inside, on the outside he was gracious and generous.

His mum would have been so very proud.

I know I was.

After the funeral, it was straight into the hectic track release of Hear The Chant. Although myself and Mack didn't exactly get off on the right foot when we first met, he worked wonders to get the very best exposure he could get for Doug and I.

He got promoters tripping over themselves to be part of the unveiling of the track, he set up radio and music magazine interviews, he even got us an appearance on TRACKZ TV.

Doug also organised having some professional images done; together and individually. He wanted there to be an authenticity about us. He wanted his followers to see the authentic chemistry and creativity that existed between us.

And as scared as I was about being a part of any social media promotion, it has actually been a positive experience this time round. Doug and Mack showed me how to get the best of any online presence. It wasn't simply about bombarding people with messages of 'download Hear The Chant' and 'buy this awesome track'; it was about getting our followers to invest in us. For them to even want to do that, they had to feel like they could relate to us. So almost every day, we would include them in our lives; with messages, photos, updates and news. It was about them not thinking that we were just marketing, it was about them feeling like they were somehow involved in the release of our track.

And Hear The Chant has done amazingly well. It continues to get a lot of air time. It has reached the number one spot in many dance charts, both here in the UK and internationally. We have kept the performing of it live, down to a minimum. Doug wants it to have an 'exclusivity' about it. In interviews, he has been open and honest about where he wants to take his music next. He wants to perform and tour less, but collaborate and create more. He is excited about mixing cultures and eras, amalgamating the musical past with the musical present.

From Doug and his whole DiCarto team, I have been learning such a lot. And all the while I have been learning, I have been growing a baby in my tummy. I have only just acquired a tiny little pregnancy bump, but last week, once we reached the twelve week mark—we finally told my parents.

We wanted them to know, before we shared our news with anyone else. Although my sickness hasn't been all that bad, there have been occasions when a certain smell of something, would embarrassingly catch me out. Certain everyday smells or scents, have triggered a sudden bout of my sickness, and sadly, my mother's favourite perfume has been one such trigger. The amount of times I have had to hide my need to either puke or dry heave around her. So as nervous as I was to tell my parents, it was actually more of a relief to tell them.

Sure, they were shocked, maybe even a little disappointed at first, but after talking it all out with them, I think they're actually both a little more than excited now. Only yesterday, dad rang me to say that he was going to set up a trust fund for the baby. When I told him that the baby wasn't even here yet, dad matter of factly replied back with. "He or she may not be born yet, but he or she is already with us."

Yup, that made me cry.

But then again, I seem to cry over a lot these days.

TV ads, certain songs, tweets and Instagram posts, quotes on FB, articles in baby magazines, trying to put a duvet cover on, getting tangled up with the hoover flex, feeling tired, getting all nostalgic, sometimes Doug just being affectionate with me...it can all flick the switch to my silly snivelling moments.

"Hey, how are both my girls doing?" Doug breezes into his apartment kitchen, turns me around so he can kiss my forehead, before lowering himself to kiss our barely there baby bump.

Chuckling, I turn back around and continue chopping up some garlic cloves, to sit beside the already chopped red onions, lemons and sweet potatoes. "How can you be so sure it's a girl in there?" I'm still chuckling, glancing at him to the left of me.

Confidently, Doug grins. "I just do." He has convinced himself that we are having a girl. Even though we don't want to find out the sex of our baby, Doug already believes in his heart that it's a little she inside of my tum. Bringing himself right behind me, he then moves my long hair to one side and affectionately kisses the exposed skin on my neck. "What are we feeding Tim and Nancy with tonight, then?" His hands now lightly caress the top of my arms, even while his lips still lovingly kiss my neck.

Not wanting to lose any of my fingers, I pause all of my chopping. Doug is distracting me, excitingly distracting me. Whether he is being tenderly adoring or desirously needy; the air always feels so static whenever we are in close proximity to one another.

When he's achingly this close, achingly this loving; all of my thoughts get sinfully and deliciously so full of him. "I'm...I'm, trying...trying to make chicken traybake." My voice is sensuously now so stuttered.

Moving his lips back and forth on my neck, Doug's mouth kind of now vibrates against it. "Mmmm, anything I can help you with? I'm all finished with what I was doing in the studio." His nose is now nuzzling against me and the heat of his breath is causing a quickening in my heart.

Quickly, I pivot on the balls of my bare feet. "You can kiss me." My fingers immerse themselves in his dark hair, wanting and needing him to kiss me senseless.

I used to be afraid that Doug would treat me differently once we had it confirmed that I was definitely pregnant, but he doesn't.

He has always been caring, always been thoughtful.

But he still looks at me in that wicked way that he does, like he's mentally undressing me with one roguish mental thought. I love that. I love that he's not treating me like bone china. I love that he's not afraid to touch me, just because I am pregnant. Yes, I am pregnant. Pregnant, and more than usual, randy.

Okay, my boobs are sore, I cry at the drop of a hat, tiredness gets on my nerves and my nausea and sickness can strike at any time, but my libido...put it this way, she's grown DiCarto greedy.

I had visions of myself craving for silly things like eating sponge or new carpets, but no...I seem to be craving only Doug.

I want him all the time.

Near me, on me, in me...I need him.

"The chicken traybake can wait." I'm excited, out of breath, unbuttoning his jeans with impatient, fumbling fingers.

Grinning and clumsily kissing me, Doug sounds just as excited, just as out of breath. "Yeah, it can." He's now wrangling with my jeans, eager to get beyond my knickers. "You want it right here? Right now?" His eyes are dark, dark burnet and playful.

Smirking, I look at him with wild and frisky irises. "Yes, right here, right now."

The chicken traybake could wait.

Nancy and Tim could wait.

Everything could now wait.

**The sexy video above is: BODY2BODY - ATB ft CONOR MATTHEWS & LAUR**