Breaking The Ice

Pack Your Stuff

TJ's POV

I could visibly see Harry's anxiety worsening as he drove us toward Brielle's apartment, his grip on the wheel getting a little tighter, his body language becoming tense, and his obvious worry making its way through him and appearing on his face with every passing second.

I knew what he was thinking, all of the reasons why going to see Brielle could blow up in our faces, making everything worse and ensuring that he would never get out of the mess she created, and it was obvious that he was afraid that the consequences of our actions would be the worst case scenario for both of us.

We both know what could happen, that us even speaking to Brielle could be used against him to make him look worse, that any credibility either of us had would be thrown out, and since I was his alibi and the only person who could even remotely prove his innocence, that would basically mean it was over for him. The case would be turned over to the police, his reputation, his career, his life, would be destroyed. If by some miracle he managed to avoid going to jail, he would be shipped back to England with no hope of ever playing professional hockey, wouldn't finish his degree, and would forever be known as someone who was capable of doing things he couldn't even bring himself to say out loud.

I was terrified for him and, selfishly, terrified of where that would leave me.

I didn't even want to think about what my life would be like without Harry, without the comfort and support he always gave me. It was obvious that my days of playing hockey were numbered, and without it there would be a landslide of shit thrown my way that I had no way of preparing for, but it wasn't just about my own life and how much things could change. Harry was the only person who really understood me, who just knew things without me having to tell him, who I knew 1000% would always have my back no matter what. I feared what would happen to me without him, but more than that I feared what would happen to him without me.

We both knew that he was battling that thing inside himself, that whatever happened in England before he came to Michigan was something that had changed him in a way I'd never understand. I saw the way his Aunt and Uncle worried about him, how they constantly doted on him as if he was fragile and needed the extra support, almost like they were trying to make up for something. At first I'd thought maybe they were just trying to be extra supportive since he was so far from home, but it was obviously more than that, like they were so afraid that they might lose him somehow that they couldn't help themselves.

I got the feeling it was the same with his parents, that they'd somehow held onto him so tightly that he felt smothered by them, that that's why he always seemed frustrated with how often they called or how much attention they gave him. In the beginning I'd thought that he was just ungrateful to not appreciate having a family that loved him so much, but the more I'd been around when he'd spoken to them the more it seemed to go beyond just parents worrying about their child. His entire family seemed so acutely aware that he was going through something, desperate to help him but not knowing how, and clinging to him like he was all they had left.

And Harry also seemed acutely aware of that.

He was always going out of his way to reassure them all, to be as understanding as he could even when he was frustrated. He wanted so badly to make them proud, to make up for whatever he'd done, and he had mentioned more than once that they'd been through hell. It was as if he had somehow caused their pain, but that he was aware he needed to take care of them all somehow. It was a dynamic that I just couldn't seem to figure out no matter how hard I tried, but through it all there was one thing that was glaringly obvious.

He was incredibly loved, and he reciprocated that love with everything inside of him.

The very idea of disappointing his family was more than he could handle, and that's how I knew that he would walk into that building with me no matter how hard it was for him. I knew he would take my hand, and come with me, because when Harry and I were together there was no battle we couldn't face. I knew he needed me, the same way I needed him, and that was exactly why I knew we had to do the stupidest thing either of us had ever done.