Beauty and the Beast | Fillie

The Void

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For all of that night in which Millie couldn't stop to cry, the dawn had finally come.

After all the guests left the mansion, and the maids were still up, cleaning the collective mess and the remnants of the shared euphoria for the engagement party, the members of the house retired in their apartments for a good night of sleep.

Leaving her best friend alone was an option not contemplated; Lilia offered her to sleep in her room and Millie just couldn't say no; the blonde one cuddled her all night, listening to her cries and sobs for all of those hours. She was broken, completely devastated.

It was like someone took her heart away; how could you live without it? After understanding how good was loving someone, how could you go back to your normal life? That was the only thing she asked and couldn't answer.

The man she wanted was two rooms distant; but that time she couldn't sneak in and sleep with him, stealing his warmth and comfort. The right side of the mattress was filled by another woman.

Replaced. Substituted. Unfair. Totally heart breaking. Millie could seriously think about all the nasty and awful words in the vocabulary, but neither one could express how she felt.

It was simply unspeakable, out of human's conception: the killing thought of abandoning someone when you didn't want to; the urge of letting go the best part of you because the world was just a selfish place, and not caring of other people's feelings.

Beauty, kindness, love and fairness were dead. Millie's heart included.

And she also told Lilia the truth. The truth about their deal; the truth about her teaching him how to get Grace back. The expression of the housekeeper was a mixture she couldn't define: a combination of stupefaction and tenderness; because she understood they fell in love starting with a dare... in the most untypical way. Just two people like them, so inexpert with feelings, could have started their love story like that.

Millie blinked her eyes and looked around the room, feeling like a fish out of the sea; feeling that terrible sensation of not-belonging to a place anymore. Feeling completely distant.

Still sleepy and tired, the (ex) housemaid slowly got up from the queen sized bed, while Lilia was looking at her with tired and broken eyes.

It was Christmas Eve, and she needed to go back to her normal life. To her loved ones.

"Honey, it's only 6 a.m. You don't need to leave so soon..." she suggested, still with a tired face, looking at her wearing her robe, in order to run downstairs, preparing her suitcase, call a taxi and leave once and for all.

Honestly, she didn't know how she would have lived from that moment on: she was finally leaving the house of the man she learnt to love, yes, the man she loved... who was in that precise moment laying on their bed with his future wife.

And just the thought of it made her feel terrible sick, because the side of that woman was sleeping on was hers; the shape of the mattress was hers; the bed in which they kissed and cuddled was hers; most of all, the man who was sleeping next to Grace was hers.

She clenched her fists and grabbed her beautiful dress of the night before, hugging it tightly.

He bought it just for making her happy.

"I want to leave now." Millie said apathetically, while walking towards the door. She had no tears left to cry. She had reached the lowest point.

"I know he will look for me as soon as he gets up. He will look for me, kiss me again, saying goodbye — I don't want to." she continued, giving her the explanation of her actions.