Love Will Be There

Dreams

'I don't really remember the rest of the night. But it was the worst way to end my birthday.

I had fallen asleep after I had with him, but like I said I couldn't recall. Everything was a blur.

The next morning I woke up at 12:00pm. So noon, I don't know why I slept the late but I didn't even care. I walked to the kitchen and ate a sandwich. I peaked over the side to see if Keaton was in the living room or if it was just Tyler and Wes. Of course Keaton was in there and by himself. It was the tv I was hearing.

I thought it's now or never..... I wasn't going to tell him about the cancer. But I was going to fix the argument we had last night.

I walked over so I am on plopped myself next to him on the couch.

"Um... Hi." I said awkwardly as if I was talking to him for the first time.

"hi" he said plainly.

"Listen about last night...." I said.

"You know what let's just forget about last night I'm sorry whatever I did to you and clearly I can't know what The whole entire world knows." Keaton got up and walked about.

"Gosh I hate myself..." I whispered softly." And began to cry.

I walked into my room and slammed the door.

"Why did god have to curse me with this?" I whispered.

"Can I just die ..." I whispered.

I looked over to my bathroom, and thought the medicine cabinet.

I thought 'maybe just 1'

I grabbed a bottle and and opened it, I didn't even know what kinda of medication it was but it was a bunch of white pills. I dumped them out on my hand. I took 6 and after a min I felt super drowsy. Great so this would be a fast process. As I was about to put the rest in my mouth, when a hand hit all the pills out of my hand and all over the bathroom floor.

"LILLY WHAT ARE YOU DOING" Keaton shouted.

"I..I don't know ..... I just want to I can't deal with this."

"Lilly what's going on?" Keaton asks.

"my legs are weak and I feel super dizzy..."

I couldn't keep my balance.

Keaton quickly picked me up and gently laid me on the bed.

I slowly fell asleep. I feel Keaton shaking me...

"LILLY DONT GO STAY HERE...

LILLY

LILLY"

"I..I feel like sleeping.."

Keaton held me tight.

"I will let you sleep LILLY just don't leave me!!"

I shut my eyes and fell asleep.'

"Lilly

LILLY." Tyler yelled while shaking me.

"Are you ok?" Tyler said

"Yea I think."

"I don't know what dream you wee having but you were screaming"

"It was a dream..."

"Uhhh..???"

"Oh good it was."

"Wait what?"

"Nevermind."

Tyler and I walk to the kitchen and for real I get a sandwich and eat it. Me trying to kill myself was a dream and Keaton saving me was a dream. Thank goodness.

"Where are the guys?" I asked

"Talking to management in the city." Tyler said

"Oh..."

"Are you ok? You seem cloudy??..." Tyler asked

"Yea I'm fine.."I said

We after went to get ready and went to Tyler's house, and or moms house. I hung out with Tyler, Ally and Jessi. They laughed and danced around while I sat there taking videos of them.

After that Tyler and I headed home. It was 2:30pm when we got there. Keaton and Wesley were home, but I decided to just go lay down in my room and stare at the ceiling. After about an hour Keaton slowly walks I to my room to ask of he could talk.

"Hi" Keaton said

"Hey.."

"Look I'm sorry about last night, as a boyfriend, I need to respect and support your decisions, but all I want to know is if you are ok." Keaton said very shyly.

I hugged him, tight, then whispered "For now I will be."

Keaton let go of my hug and looked me in the eyes... he knew there was pain, but I made sure that he believed there wasn't. I ate dinner with the guys at this vegan restaurant and then to pink berry. I enjoyed the rest if my night. and when we got home the boys went to go work on the new single they were going to put out 'Love Will Be There' while I got ready, plugged in my lights and went to bed.

Over all it was just a very weird day...