Naruto One-Shot (Yaoi)

Lose yourself in me/ItaSasu

This story was made by DragaonofFernweh and has 9993 words, ItaSasu.

Do not fear fate, and you will never fear at all.

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It was a dismal, dreary afternoon, but the overcast skies did nothing to diminish the excitement from high-schoolers when the bell rang to signify the end of the school day. Today was the start of spring break, and that only added to the energy bouncing around. Many were jogging across the school grounds to the buses, while others were traipsing along in giggling packs to their cars or to walk home. Sasuke watched the stampede from beneath the safety of an old oak tree, one of a few on the campus grounds, where he was waiting with a few friends for their respective rides to pick them up. Sasuke tended to hitch a ride from a friend, but sometimes his older brother had an afternoon off and would pick him up. Sasuke curled his lip with disdain, having come to dread the extra time he'd have to spend around Itachi.

That thought alone made guilt rise in Sasuke's chest. It wasn't that he and Itachi had a poor relationship; on the contrary, they'd always had a strong one. They were closer than most siblings were, considering that Itachi had all but raised Sasuke on his own for most of their lives. When they were children, their parents had gotten into a fatal car accident that left them both dead. Itachi had been thirteen years old, Sasuke eight. They had little other family, and none that they were too close with, and despite his young age Itachi had taken it upon himself to take care of Sasuke. Their closest relative, a man called Madara, had paid for their expenses until Itachi graduated high school and took on work of his own.

Their family had run a lucrative business, and it'd been Itachi's destiny to overtake it once he became of age. Sasuke thought it lucky that no one else in their family had tried to steal the rights away, or tried to send him and Itachi to some distant boarding school to get rid of them. Itachi had, without complaint, kept their household together, and even now he continued supporting Sasuke until the younger graduated. Itachi wanted Sasuke to attend university, and he might, sometime. Sasuke's plans for now, though, were to work for a while, to build some savings (that he had earned on his own, not Itachi) and experience. He felt he owed his brother, and he'd rather be able to help pay his own way through school. Itachi had done so much for Sasuke as things were, providing for him and being the one constant in Sasuke's life that he could trust and who loved him unconditionally.

So, no, it wasn't that he had a strained relationship with Itachi. In fact, it was the opposite, and so obscenely out of reach of simple resolve. Had it been something as fixable as a distant brother, Sasuke would feel relieved. Instead, he had to wonder if he was going insane. He might've done that a long time ago, because if nothing else, he was definitely sick in a twisted way. If anyone ever found out about Sasuke's secret (something he'd clutched to his heart for months, now) they would send him away, lock him up, no one would ever hear from him again.

Sasuke's shoulders sagged in defeat at the thought. He'd deserve that, probably even worse than that. He had no idea where everything had gone wrong, or when he'd first started developing such salacious, forbidden feelings. How could anyone else imagine what it was like waking up after having a filthy dream of your own brother? Sasuke could hardly even look Itachi in the eye, anymore. Instead of spending much time with Itachi, Sasuke spent most of his free time out, either studying, working on projects and extra credit at school, or doing something with friends. Whenever he did have to be at home, Sasuke tended to favor the privacy of his room.

He knew it baffled Itachi, but it wasn't like Sasuke could give him any answers about the sudden changes. That would destroy their relationship and would put Sasuke out on the streets. He'd be lucky if Itachi didn't spread it from one end of the country to the next. Sasuke would have to walk in front of a speeding car, and that was already a tempting thought, now!