//you don't know me//finn Wolfhard

chapter 24 - forgetting about you

Finns Pov

Are you proud? Are you proud that you ruined us? I'm so fucking tired of having to help you. Your so emotionless, I try so hard to help and fix you but you hopeless.

I hate your smile.

I hate your hair.

I hate your clothes.

I hate your eyes.

I hate everything about you.

Most of all I hate when you drinking. You fuck up so much worse when you do.

I feel like I give you so many chances but you still fuck up.

But I don't mean any of that. I don't mean one word. I wish I did though. I wish I did so that I could get you out of my head. You're always there, I feel like i'm going crazy.

You didn't ruin us, i'm not tired of trying to help you, I wish I could help you right now so that I can be near you. You are full of love and hope even though you say you aren't.

I miss your smile.

I miss your hair.

I miss your clothes.

I miss your eyes.

I miss everything about you.

I grab the bottle of vodka on my bedside table and start chugging it. A sour and vile taste flowed into my mouth, numbing me, taking me away from the real world and putting me into a fantasy. Where there's no you. I don't know if it's love or lust that I feel for this liquid, but I do know that this toxic liquid, is my cure to sadness and depression. It's my cure to forgetting about you.

The thing that sucks is it takes about ten minutes for my cure to work. Now you, are all I can think about right now. I hate that, you're all I can think about. I don't want to think about you, I think back to everything that's happened with us. The good times, the bad times. I would never trade any of them. I'm angry now, I hate that thinking back to our happiest memories brings me to anger. Why did this have to happen to us?

I clench the glass bottle in my hand, I feel my blood boil in my veins and my breathing picks up.

I bet you're happy that you've gotten rid of me. You're probably with Wyatt now, it's okay he can treat you better. I don't know why you even bothered with me. I'm nothing, I could never treat you right.

I need to get up, I can't lay down anymore. I need to do something, i'm going to break something.

I look around my room and try to find anything to do to get my mind off of her. I need to get you off of my mind.

I grab my guitar and start playing it. Music always helps me, it has to help me forget about you, right?

I would always play you songs, you loved it. I hated when you took videos me though, but I didn't say anything because one look at you and your smile I just couldn't hurt you.

But I could physically hurt you, could I.

I play the wrong cord. I feel my arms tense but I still try playing. I have to forget about you.

I remember when you would kiss me awake in the morning. Your soft lips all over my face in the mornings is something i'm going to miss about you the most. I'm going to miss everything about you the most.

Now your lips are going to be on his face.

"Fuck!" I stand up and smash my guitar against the wall. I look at my beloved instrument and it's completely in half. I drop the broken pieces of wood and they hit the ground with a loud crash. I look up at the wall and there's a hole in it.