Trigger warning
Peter couldn't get to sleep no matter how much he tried. He just sat on the roof of the house with his legs dangling over the edge.Maybe if I'm dead things will be better. For everyone.
That wasn't the first time he'd thought something like that and it definitely wasn't going to be the last, he could feel the thoughts getting stronger. He sat there until 5am and death was all he could think about.
Peter climbed back down the outside wall, in the window and got back into bed. It wasn't long before the sun came up and was shining through the window turning the dark room bright.
He winced slightly turning away, he used to love the sun coming through the window now he just prays that it'd leave him be a little longer.
He stayed in bed for about an hour debating whether he should get up or not. He decided that he had to, so he got up and made the bed he was in and got changed into his dark red oversized hoodie, black jeans and checkered slip on vans.
He checked his phone and saw he had a text from Ned. He would usually read it but he didn't he just put his phone in his back pocket and left the room.
He was going to be late for school if he didn't hurry so he was going to run but was stopped by Tony.
"Where you going Pete?"
"Uhh school? I'm gonna be late s..so I need to go," he told him awkwardly.
"I'll drive you," Tony said with a smile picking up his keys.
"Oh it..it's fine, I'm okay walking," he didn't know why Tony wouldn't let me just leave by himself.
"Nope not happening get in the car kid," Tony said still with a smile.
When he got out the car he told peter he'd pick him up after school.
•
Once he got into school he walked to his locker and opened it. He just stood there thinking the same thoughts as last night. Peter was suddenly brought back to reality by Mj jumping over leaning on his shoulder who was as followed by Ned.
After a small, what Peter thought was an unneeded conversation with them, he found out that Ned didn't tell Mj about what happened at the weekend. He knew he wouldn't and was glad he didn't.
As the bell went he closed his locker and walked to his class, which was different from them both, saying by bye to them both.
•
Peter was starting avoiding them again, he used to be better at it as he walked straight into Ned at lunch.
"Peter, are you okay? We've been looking for you," Ned said worried about his friend.
"I'm fine, Ned. Don't worry about it," Peter said trying to walk away only to be stopped by Ned's hand grabbing his arm.
"I remember last time you said you were fine and not to worry about you. I know your not, I just want to know why your lying," he paused as Peter turned to him fully. "I just want to help Peter."
"I know. But you can't, I'm sorry."
•
After school Peter walked out the doors, walking as slow as he can to Tony's car.
"Would it have killed you to have walked a bit faster, kid?" Tony asked smiling as he started to drive towards home.
"Didn't want to try just incase," Peter laughed a fake laugh but Tony seemed to believe it.
Tony felt like he was doing something right if he was laughing again but that's when he noticed he was hiding his face and wasn't looking at him.
'Shit I really shouldn't have kids' Tony was thinking.
"What's up kid?" He finally asked after a couple minutes.
"What?...Nothing I'm good."
Tony couldn't help notice he wasn't looking away from the window and couldn't help not believe him. But he just left it at that hoping that he'd come to him if he needed him.
"Well Bruce will be taking your stitches out on Thursday," Tony tried to change the topic.
"Okay that's good I guess," Peter didn't want Dr Banner thinking he was weak.
•
Once they got back to Tony's house Peter went straight to the room he was using and closed the door.
Oh shit no..not right now....please not now, he felt like he was about to have a panic attack he slid down the wall and sat on the floor with his head on his knees.
•
"Sir it would appear that Mr Parker is having a panic attack," Friday informed Tony who was working in the lab.
"Where is he?" He asked standing up instantly.
"His room," Friday said and Tony headed towards him, practically running there.
He knocked, "Peter can I come in?"
"No...I'm..Busy....homew.....homework." Peter couldn't help feel even weaker.
"You sure? You don't sound good," Tony knew he needed to get in but didn't want to without his permission unless he had to. "Come on kid."
"No!" Peter snapped. "Sorry bu...but I'm f.....fine."
Shit he's not going to believe you.
"I'm coming in Peter."
He opened the door to see the teen crying and hyperventilating on the floor, pulling at his sleeves and quickly hiding something.
Tony knew what it was and could feel his heart break a little. "Give it to me," he held his hand out, "please."
"I'm so..I'm sorry..Mr s...Mr Stark," Peter was crying and hardly breathing.
"Kid you've got to calm your breathing down alright? Come on breath with me." He sat on the floor next to Peter, he was trying to focus on one thing at a time but his thoughts were everywhere.
"Mr Stark..I'm so..sorry," and he fell into Tony's arms hugging him and crying in his shoulder.
Tony didn't know what to do but stayed like this for a while until his breathing calmed down.
Peter pushed away. "I'm sorry Mr Stark," he was still crying.
"It's alright kid, but can I have it. Please?" He asked surprising himself with how softly he was speaking.
Tony held his hand out and Peter reluctantly put the blade he had in Tony's hand.
"Thank you and I'm sorry but I'm gonna have to take a look and get that cleaned up," Tony said putting the blade in his pocket.
Peter didn't want to and Tony knew this but Peter knew it had to happen he pulled his sleeves back up crying more than he already was.

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Broken But Not Alone
FanfictionPeter had been in a bad place for a while but how long until he gives up his fake smile that everyone believes? Can he be saved in time? Is there another way out other than the only one Peter can think of? Set after homecoming. Trigger warning: Sel...