The biggest secret !Complete!

Its life or death

Grayson

Evangeline spent most of her time sleeping. I spent most of mine laying next to her, the pictures of what would be my now three month old twins in her arms. The smile she painted on her face, the joy that she held them. The pain behind her eyes, the agony. Her screams of pain i would never forget in my entire life. I heard them in my dreams. It was nothing but pure torture, putting her through the pain of labour to produce nothing she could bring home. Two perfect little boys cremated in the same casket, ashes mixed together, the only thing they'd ever know, each and other and Evangeline. Her heartbeat. It kept beating but I was sure she wished it wouldn't.

Two months ago

"Im back baby," I called from the front door. I didn't like leaving her but we had to eat, she had to eat. She was skin and bone. Four weeks since our babies had appeared into this cruel world. A world they never saw. I thought my heart had broken when Evangeline left, when I thought she was bringing my boys into the world without me but that wasn't heartbreak. This is a constant dull ache that never ever leaves. It may lessen for a moment or two but then it comes back, threefold. No answer from Evangeline. "Evangeline? Are you sleeping?" I dumped the bags on the counter and walked into the bedroom. "No no no! No not you, please not you as well," I cried at the sight before me. She lay there in her pyjamas, an empty bottle of pills in one hand and a pen and paper in the other.
'I'm sorry Gray, I can't leave my boys alone'

"Help!" I screamed over and over "Please help me,"

Beau

"Please help me," I heard the moans from Seph... Evangelines apartment, quickly racing through the door I followed the sound.
"Oh my god,"
"Beau phone an ambulance," I did as I was asked throwing the phone to my ear and running to the bed. Placing Evangelines lifeless body in the recovery position I held Grayson. A sight I never wanted to witness again.

"Grayson?"
"I'm here gorgeous," she placed her hands on my chest, "I'm here," we made a pact to never ask each other were we okay. We weren't. We may never be okay again.
"I need you," she whispered,
"I'm always right beside you," it was true. I hadn't left her side since that dreaded day. I shouldn't have left her then.
"No, I need you. I need to feel anything other than pain," she slowly climbed on top of me kissing every inch of my face and making her way down my neck.
"We don't need to do this,"
"I want to," she frowned making her way underneath the covers, moving further down my body.

Evangeline

I laughed as Graysons body collided with mine. A wave of sadness hit me as I realised how close he could get, every inch of us touching but he was still so gentle with me.
"I love you," he whispered breathlessly.
"I love you," His eyes shot up to mine and I smiled,
"That's the first time you've said that to me since the airport," I nodded, I was too scared to love anyone ever again but I loved him. I loved him with every inch of me. "I'm..."
"If you say sorry one more time I'm going to stab you," he laughed, rolling off me and holding his hands up in surrender.
"I was going to ask if you wanted to go out for dinner?" I was taken aback. I hadn't left the house for three months. Not by choice anyway.
"Okay,"
"Okay? We can just go to Maccies. Somewhere quiet,"
"No," I whispered, forcing myself to do something other than fester here. "Let's go somewhere nice," he nodded smiling.
"Okay and if you want to leave even during food we'll leave okay?" I nodded. "Can I ask you something?"
"Yes," I whispered terrified of the next words that would fall from his lips,
"Persephone?" I nodded, Persephone. "Why Sephy?"
"I don't know, it seemed right. The easiest way to disappear." He nodded and my heart raced, did I wish for a little while it was me and not her? Of course I did, I've wished that for years
"Shower?" He asked heading towards the bathroom, I smiled and followed close behind.