If We Could Only Turn Back Time

If We Could Only Turn Back Time Chapter 19

hi another update (: omg have you guys heard/seen 1Ds Wonderwall and Im Yours cover? Where has it been all my LIFE?! <3 ugh. i feel in love. Time for another chappie!(:

**IMPORTANT NEWS** im thinking about doing a romance story, not involving 1D and i was wondering if any of you would read it. I wanna try something out of the box (: COMMENT BELOW.

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Rosies POV:

**Listen to the song: Let Me Be The One by Jermaine Dupri. it goes really well with this chapter & it was actually my inspiration for it.Sometimes it makes me cry a bit ahaa**

I have to do it. I have to. There was too much going on now. Did I love them? hell yes. But I have to do whats best for me in the end.

My stuff was all packed up, and the boys were in the studio till 11:30 tonight. Niall wanted me to go and listen to them sing, but I told him I wasn't feeling well.

I lay on our bed, a paper on my lap and a pen in my hand.

'Dear Nialler,

Hi baby. You may have noticed I'm gone haha. But yeah... I'm leaving. I can't hurt you anymore. You don't deserve the sadness I've brought upon you. I'll always love you. You'll always be my first love. But... I can't do it anymore. I don't wanna do this, but I have to. For us. I can't keep hurting you anymore. Thank you for everything you've done for me. Thank you so much.

I love you.

Forever Yours,

Rosie'

A tear slipped down my cheek, and i whipped it away quickly.

'You can rip up the paper now Rosie... this can all be better and they'll be no reason to run away. You can stay here with the love of your life.' I thought

I can't. I have to do what's best for the both of us.

Closing the letter and sealing it with a kiss, I took off my ring from Niall.

I placed it on top of the letter, sobs escaping from me.

Why did love have to hurt so much?

I dialed Sarrahs number, and she picked up on the first ring.

"Rosie! What's going o- are you crying?! what happened?!"

"P-please Sarrah, pick me up please."

"I'll be there soon. Stay put."

"okay. See you soon. Don't tell Zayn or the boys."

I hung up before she could reply.

Without thinking, I walked into our closet- I mean Nialls closet and grabbed boxers and his university shirt, throwing them in my bag.

I needed to have a little part of him with me.

I took one last look at our room, and wiped the tears away from my cheek.

"Goodbye." I whispered to no one in particular.

I closed the door, and looked down the hall.

Harrys room.

Should I leave him a letter?

I walked into his room, looking at everything for the first time.

It was suprisingly really neat and organized. I took out a piece of paper and began to write.

'Hazza,

I know you love me. And I love you too. But, I'm in love with Niall. I know it hurts but you can't keep chasing after me. I understand that you can be better for me. But the more you tried to split Niall and I up, the more I loved Niall. Please. Don't let this split you guys apart. Please don't. You wanted me to be yours...and I am in a way. But I cant love you the way you love me. I'm so sorry. But you're my best friend and I love you. Please don't forget that.

Goodbye,

Rosie'

One tear fell, landing on the paper. Then another and another.

I folded up the paper, placing it on his bed as well.

I heard a honk come from outside and I ran out, seeing Sarrah.

I opened the trunk, putting my bags in. Then I climbed into the passengers seat.

Sarrah didnt say anything.

She took one look at me and hugged me.

A hug was what I needed really bad. I sobbed into her shoulder, not wanting to let her go.

"It'll be okay Rosie." Sarrah reassured, stroking my hair

"I got to get out of her Sarrah. I'm sorry. But please drive me to the airport."

Sarrah gapped at me, "W-where are you going?" I handed her my acceptance paper.

"UCSC. Or the University of California, Santa Cruz. I got accepted..." I spoke, not looking into her eyes

"You're going to run away?!" Sarrah raised her voice an octave higher

"No... I'm just gonna go to school. It's not even that far."

"I don't want you to go...especially like this."

"I have to do what's best for me."

"I'm going to miss you." Sarrah cried

"I'm going to miss you too... I'm always just a phone call away. Don't worry about me." I squeezed her hand

She squeezed my hand back, and started the car.

We drove in silence. It wasn't those uncomfortable ones; it was the ones where we just want to enjoy each other while I'm still here.

"What about your cancer?" Sarrah broke the silence

"I have 7 months left. I'll be back before then. And I'm already checked to a hospital there."

"What about Elena?"

"She knows. I talked to her. Maybe I'll be better by then. Maybe even cured."

"Hopefully. I don't want you to leave me behind Rosie."

"I know Sarrah. I know. If I could have anything in this world, anything at all, it'd be to get rid of all of this."

"If I could have anything, it'd be to have you with me longer."

Too soon, we pulled up to the airport.

Sarrah got out with me, and pulled my bags out.

"This is it huh?" Sarrah asked, her voice slightly cracking

All i could do is nod and reach out for her.

We hugged forever, our tears soaking eachothers shirt.

"Be safe." Sarrah whispered in my ear

"I promise to keep in touch." I let her go

I walked away from her, and right before I went inside, I blew her a kiss.

She "caught" it and waved goodbye. Tears streaming down her face

As I walked through the airport, I realized I was going through a whole nother adventure. One to cross off my bucket list: #3: Go to College

"Flight 188 to Santa Cruz, now boarding."

As I plugged in my earphones, the lyrics of Let Me Be The One flowed through my ears:

"Let me be the one to break it up so we dont have to make excuses

We don't need to fight, just say our prayer

Someone wins and someone loses

We just have to say our love was true, but how now become a lie

So I'm telling you I love you one last time and goodbye."

I picked myself up along with my luggage, took one last look, and left Hollywood, California.

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