The Mentalist - What if?

Chapter 23

Waking the next morning, her head was still pounding, her nose was blocked and her chest felt full Of cold; as usual, Jane had been right. Realising she was alone in the bed, she padded into the lounge where Jane was sat on the sofa, Matilda on his lap as cartoons played In the background; foregoing a drink, she sat next to him, pulled the blanket over herself and snuggled into his side.

"Go back to sleep" he said, wrapping an arm around her as her finger found itself gripped in her daughter's hand.

"Missed you" she whispered.

"I'm not going anywhere; get some rest and I'll make some lunch when you wake up"

"You were right"

"Say that again"

"You were right, I don't feel well" she said, snuggled further into the blanket.

"You'll be okay; it's been a long and emotional couple of days"

As she watched her daughter react to the sounds and colours of the cartoons, she let her eyes close; when she awoke again, it was to the sound of Jane in the kitchen whilst Matilda was playing in the play pen. Realising she was now lying down on the sofa, she sat up, ran her fingers through her hair before standing up and lifting her daughter onto her hip; kissing her forehead, she found her way to the kitchen to where Jane was heating up some soup on the stove.

"Hey, feeling better?" He asked as Matilda's laughter alerted him to their presence.

"A little, that smells great"

"It'll be ready in a couple of minutes"

Placing the three month old into the high chair, she grabbed a mug of coffee before taking a seat up to the table; within minutes, Jane had placed the soup in front of them and joined her, taking a hand in his.

"You've got some of your colour back; that late night talk probably didn't help"

"It did; despite the headache, it was the best night's sleep I've had in months. I know I need to keep talking to you, or someone; it's just hard"

"And I'm right here when you need to; I can take some extra days off if you need it. It's not like I really do a lot anyway is it?" He joked.

"You do more than you think; you might be annoying and sometimes Damn right crazy with some of your ideas but we wouldn't close halve the cases as quick as we do without you" she said, giving him a genuine smile.

"I just like winding you up"

"Don't I know it?! You're the reason I have so much paperwork; but I don't know how we managed without you"

"Finish your soup; we can take a little walk this afternoon if you feel like it"

By mid-afternoon, after a long shower, Lisbon had agreed to a walk so, with Matilda in the stroller, they walked towards the main shopping area.

"Feeling better?"

"Not really but the fresh air might help"

"Whenever you wanna go back, just let me know"

"I'm just so exhausted; working back to back cases is nothing compared to raising a child. Don't get me wrong, I love Matilda to bits and I'll do anything to protect her, I guess I didn't realise how hard it would be"

"You're doing a brilliant job, despite what you might think; that little girl has the best mom she could ever want"

"And she has you too; you can teach her your magic tricks and I have no doubt you'll show her how to wind me up just as much as you do. I want her to grow up and not be scared to try new things or to be scared of change; I don't want her growing up like me, scared of change and lonely and so career focused she doesn't have anything else in her life"

"You're forgetting one thing" he said, making her stop on the middle of the sidewalk.

"What's that?"

"That's who you were, not who you are now; you found out your were pregnant at, let's face it, the worst possible time and yet, you persevered and carried on. You took time out from work when your health needed you to, you've stayed away from the office since she was born; you've  embraced every second of been a mom, even though the moments of self-doubt and uncertainty"

"I know" she sighed before they carried on walking. "The thought of going back to work and leaving her actually terrifies me; what if a suspect, guilty or otherwise, gets pissed off at you and comes after our daughter? With everything we've already been through to get her here, I couldn't bear it if anything was to happen"

"It wont; Teresa, I promise you, I won't let the same thing happen again. I'll be careful, no more taunting people; tricking, yes but not if they are even remotely dangerous and"

"Jane..." she whispered, cutting him off. "I think I need to sit down"

With a bench coming into their sight, Jane support Lisbon until she was sat down with her head between her legs, willing the dizziness and nausea to go away.

"Have some of this" he said, pulling out the bottle of soda from the bottom of the stroller.

"I feel sick" she said after taking a sip, leaning over the back of the bench to throw up in the bushes.

"Let's get you back"

"Need to stay here"

"Okay"

Ten minutes later, with the dizziness passing, Jane pushed the stroller with one hand whilst his other arm supported an exhausted Lisbon; back at the cabin, he sent her back to bed whilst he settled a sleeping Matilda into the travel cot before sliding in next to his girlfriend, holding her close with the blankets over her.

"Get some sleep; the store in town delivers so I'll give them a call. Get them to drop some ginger ale and meds in"

"Matilda?"

"Is fast asleep; try not to worry about anything. Get some rest..."

As her breathing evened out, he waited until her little snores, caused by the cold, began before carefully slipping out the bed, replacing himself with a pillow; with a call into the store, he grabbed a cup of tea before sitting back next to her, he stayed there until she woke again, only moving to answer the door.

"Jane" she whimpered.

"Ssh, I'm here" he soothed, brushing her hair back. "I'm not going anywhere"

"So cold" she shivered, teeth clattering together.

"I'll get you another blanket" he said, kissing her forehead, noticing the fever.

With another blanket on top and a hot water bottle in her arms, Lisbon soon settled down again; she slept for the rest of the night, not even stirring when Matilda wanted feeding.