The Mentalist - What if?

Chapter 27

By Monday morning, Lisbon was able to lift Matilda into her arms so she sent Jane to work; despite his reservations, she wanted to prove to him, and herself, she could do this. Although she had woken early to have breakfast and see him off, she still felt tired; with Matilda having settled after a change and feed, she laid on the bed and rested for a further hour and half. When lunch time came around, she was sat on the nursery floor, Matilda in her lap as they played with the toys; feeling her phone vibrating in her jeans pocket, she wrapped an arm around her daughter and answered the call.

"Hey" she smiled.

"Hi, just thought I'd check in; you doing okay?" Jane asked, sitting on the couch in the bullpen with a cup of tea.

"We...are doing fine; we're just playing, are we baby girl?" She answered, kissing her daughters head.

"You sure?"

"Positive, any new cases?"

"Just a basic open and shut case; did you eat?"

"Not yet, but I will in a bit"

"Sure you're okay? Not overdoing it?"

"Jane, I'm fine, I promise; I know it's not going to disappear overnight but right now, this particular minute, I'm okay. I'm taking it a step at a time; I'll have a rest when Matilda goes down for her nap" she snapped.

"Okay"

"You should get back to work; we'll see you later"

"Call if you need anything"

"We will, say bye to daddy" she said putting the phone to Matilda's ear.

With a little babble, Lisbon hung up and held her daughter close; when Jane arrived home later than evening, just after 6, he found his girlfriend and daughter sat up to the dining table, a meal waiting for him.

"What's all this?" He asked, kissing them both.

"An apology for snapping earlier" she answer as he took his seat and began to eat.

"I was been overbearing"

"You were just concerned; I shouldn't have tried to do too much so soon but I got through it."

"You look tired" he said a short while later as he washed the dishes while she fed Matilda.

"A little, I guess; I'll grab an early night"

"Any plans for tomorrow?"

"Grace has the day off so we were gonna go for lunch; get out the house for an hour or so"

"Any news from the mechanic?"

"Should be ready Wednesday; was more cosmetic than anything" she yawned.

"Go and get an early night, I'll settle Matilda" he suggested, drying his hands and taking his daughter.

"Thanks" she whispered.

As she settled into the bed, she let out a long deep breath she hadn't realised she'd been holding in; in an effort to prove to Jane she was okay, she'd exhausted herself in the process.

The only trouble was, by going to bed so early, when Matilda woke wanting a feed, Lisbon found herself wide awake in the early hours; settling on the sofa, she watched her daughter drink from the bottle, content in her mother's arms. 

"Your mommy is making things hard for herself, isn't she? Your daddy worries so much about me and maybe he's right; not that I would ever tell him. He has a big enough ego already; we can manage, can't we?"

"What did I tell you? You don't have to push yourself" he said, making his presence known, taking a seat next to her. "I get you want to be independent and for me to go to work, as much as I don't want to, but I'd rather know you were happy and comfortable been alone"

"I know" she sighed as leant into his embrace. "I guess I miss the carefree side of me Jane; before I got pregnant, i didn't think twice about coming back to an empty house. Now I hate it; it's been a year since everything happened and I'm still no closer to been me again"

"You're closer than you think; Teresa, what happened, it was enough to affect anybody but then to find out you were pregnant as a result of it all, its no surprise you're feeling like you are. You're talking about it and that's a start; all you can do is take it a day at a time. Come on, let's get her settled and get some more sleep"

"I'm not tired but you go ahead"

"You need to rest, at least lie with me"

"I'll be right behind you"