What Does It Mean?

Falling?

My heart beats fast as I sit in the rain.

Holding my phone away to refrain.

Nerves grip my sides

and I know I cannot provide.

You want me there, with you, in your world.

But I have nothing else to hold dear.

Nothing at all, nothing but a mere

Portion of love you have for me. 

But you want me to repay the deed. 

Now I see myself, falling, stalling.

I am afraid that you'll leave me if you meet me. 

My heart beats fast in the rain, holding my phone to refrain.

Telling you, pick up your phone.

Before I do, postpone.