Bipolar Sunshine || J.HS

Slow Dancing In the Dark

Bitch, Slut, Useless
Those are words I called her?

My eyes flicker to her body attached to the machine. The constant beeping of it, was the only thing I could hear. Although the hospital was oddly buzzing with noise I could only hear.

BEEP BEEP BEEP

The machine was lying, she wasn't alive ... I can't see her beautiful eyes, usually filled with Joy and love. Her face pale, and lips dried and cracked open just a little bit. Her smile appearing in my thoughts, but not on her face.

I looked away sniffing my eyes watering.

Look at me

Look at what you did to her, is this how you show love Hoseok?

Don't try and guilt trip him

This isn't guilt tripping! Look at what he did to her!

SHE DESERVES IT

Why do you hate her?

I LOVE Her

Is this how you are supposed to treat someone you love?

...

ANSWER ME

Her voice spoke to me. I immediately looked at her hoping she woke up, but she wasn't.

I held my head in my arms begging for whatever madness that was going on in me, to stop. Tears welling up as I remembered everything I did to her, because she "Didn't Love me".

She Loved you and now you've killed her.

The beeping stopped, only going into a dull long beep.

My head snapped up to the monitor watching the green line fall flat.

I stepped to it hitting it multiple times as if that was going to help her. I looked at her body, more lifeless than before.

I screamed for help as I moved to hold her close to me, I repeatedly told her to come back to me. Promising Her I would treat her better, Telling her I loved her and only her. The words sorry spilling out like it was the only word I knew.

"SOMEBODY COME HELP HER, SHE'S DYING!!"

I yelled tears dropping on her beautiful face. No one came rushing in, no one heard my cries of Agony.

"Please come back Y/N." I whispered to her rocking back and forth.

She's gone, and its your fault.

I looked towards the soft voice, and cried even more when I saw Y/N in front of me her body disappearing in front of me as well as in my arms.

"I-I"

"SIR!!" I was violently shaken awake by a loud and worried voice.

"Y/N!" I chocked out as I flung myself up. I looked around and saw a nurse looking at me very worried, I also saw that Y/N was there and the monitor was on.

More tears left my eyes as relief flooded through my body. Wiping them away and turning to the nurse that put a hand on my shoulder.

"Why don't you get some rest, at home?"

"I'll stay." I said, Sitting back in the chair I was in before.

"Ok why don't you at least freshen up? There is a bathroom with showers on the Third floor, plus I could get you clothing." She offered again putting her hand back on my shoulder leaning in.

I looked at her hand, then back at her. I shrugged it off and stood.

"Don't get the clothes."

"Oh, ok. But can I get your number, just in case something happens to –"

"No." I cut her off walking out the room. I went to my car that was Valley parked during my moment of crisis. I sighed taking the bag out and locking the doors.

Such a low life, attempting to get at me while my girlfriend is in the hospital.

Does she know she's your girlfriend?

I scoffed at myself rubbing my temples, there I so much wrong I have done towards Y/N but she hasn't left my side. Well she tried but.... Forget it.

I walked into the stall only hearing one other shower on. I stepped into the second one taking off my clothes and storing them in the cabinet before stepping into the other department, which actually has the shower.

I had to give it to them this is actually a smart idea and the bathrooms are very clean. I pulled out my sponge and looked at the multiple mini liquid soaps there.

I settled on one that smelled like lavender, it reminded me of home in a way. I let the hot water hit my skin as I relax under it.

The past few hours have been an emotional rollercoaster, and I was drained. I decided that after this shower I would go to the cafeteria and buy something to eat, The last thing I ate was the meal she prepared for me which was literally the best.

She is the best

I thought and sighed again, memories and thoughts flowing in from left and right not giving me any rest.

At this point I was too tired to try and hold back my tears letting it fall out mixing with the water forgetting the soap that was only on my torso. Forgetting how to cry out as my agony came out only in chocked sobs.

Standing in the Hot water head bowed as my arms slightly held me up. Chocked sobs turning into loudspeaker gasps but returning back to its pathetic self.

After a periodically long time I was all out of tears, I pulled myself together finished showering put on the clothes and headed straight to the cafeteria.

I sighed as I sat down and ate the food I got, only thinking of the food, just in case I was proved wrong and started balling my eyes out. I think with the way I look they would put me in one of the beds making sure I was ok.

I ate in peace and silence, the slight buzz of the cafeteria being the only thing I was focused on. There was some really jucy stuff the Ahjumma's behind me were saying.

Once the Ahjummas left I did too, picking up my stuff walking to Y/N's room. Once I got in I set my bag down and stood next to her.

I looked at her beautiful face, bringing one hand to remove some hair from her face.

I brought my other hand to hold her hand, softly rubbing small circles on it. I bent down just a bit placing my lips on her forehead. Staying there for as long as possible, I stood once again admiring her everything.

"I'm Sorry."

~~~

1100K Words

"Give me reason why I should be complete"

Joji- SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK
H

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