forever + always

Chapter 15

"Mary can I talk to you?" Jake was standing in front of me biting his lip looking down at his feet.

I shift akwardly on the wall. I pull my leather jacket closer to my body as a cold wind blew. "Yeah sure." I glance over at Rachel and she nods for me to leave. I hop off the ledge and follow Jake to the big oak tree in the courtyard.

He stops under it sitting down, leaning his back against his. I sit next to him, I look over to see his eyes closed.

"I'm sorry....for last night. I just needed to do that. I couldn't stop thinking of you on the drive back to my place so I turned around and sped back to you." He looks over at me with a sad look on his face.

I was about to speak but he stopped me before the words were able to pass my lips.

"No, let me get this out. I do like you that way. That has to be obvious to you. And I'm not going to ask you out, if you don't feel the same way. But you have to understand that I am truly sorry for just randomly kissing you like that." Jake rants looking me in the eyes the whole time, as if I was going to change moods any second.

I sigh, closing my eyes tightly. I can't handle this right now. I just can't take this. I really like having him as a friend, but I'm not single. And I felt something when we kissed. MY BRAIN!!!!!

I open my eyes to see him still staring at me. I know I have to answer but in all honestly I really don't want to. "Jake, you don't have to keep apoligizing. I was never mad to begin with. It's not that I don't feel the same way as you do for me, it's just that I'm not looking for a relationship right now. That kiss last night...I felt something. I know I did, I can't deny that. But I'm sorry if I led you on in anyway."

I avoided eye contact with Jake after my mini speah. All I could do was tell him the truth, it would have been wrong if I hadn't.

I finally look up at him, and he gives me a sad smile. "I get it, thank you for telling me the truth, but I hope this doesn't effect our friendship because I love hanging out with you now."

"I promise you that I will make sure it doesn't effect our frienship. I cherish it and all my friendships too much to let it go." I sqeeze his arm, and I get up off the ground.

I hold my hand out for him to take. He gets up as well and we walk together back to Evan, and Rachel who were talking to Stan at our wall.

Today Evan, Rachel, and I have our auditions for our band and I'm excited, but then I could go with out doing you.

Classes passed agonizing slow today and currently I'm sitting at the far top corner of the bleachers in gym class as the instructor drowns on about the saftey in basketball. But we're getting no where since we only have ten minutes of class left and there's no point in being here. Everyone knows that at this school gym is practically a free period.

So here I am, curled up in my sweatshirt, trying to block out this stupid lecture. My eyes drifted closed, but before I was able to be consumed by sleep the bell rang shrilly through the gym. I headed to the locker room to get changed.

My brain is not with me right now. I can't stop thinking about this whole Jake thing. And then Ryan. I love him so much. But now I'm really confused.

Can this be anymore confusing. You know what just call me Bella.

Cause I feel like this is like twilight. And it's driving me nuts.

I feel like ripping every inch of hair off my head.

I sigh, quickly pulling on my clothes and I rush out of the gym to head to meet up with Rachel and Evan.

I see them standing by Evan's car since he picked us up at my place this morning.

I give them a small smile giving them both a hug.

We all pile into his car, heading off to my place.

Time to see if anyone actually is auditioning today. I hope so. Or this would be a big waist.

I run my fingers through my hair tugging slightly. I rest my head on the window, feeling the cold from the outside seep through the glass. There's so much running in my head right now. I want to scream.

*time skip*

Turns out a lot of people showed up. And you'd be surprised on how many people came with bagpipes. Yeah because we totally need those in our band.

"Next!" Evan yelled through a room.

A guy with brown shaggy hair with what looked like green eyes. He had a bass strapped to the back of his my chem T-shirt.

"Hello, and what's your name, and what are you playing for us?" I asked the line I had to have said to at least 20 other people.

"My name is Sebastian and I'm playing smells like a teen spirit by nirvana."

And he did. Very well might I add. He looked so into it as if it was only him and that we weren't in front of him at all. You can tell he's passionate about what he's doing. He even has a little smile on his face.

When he was finished he turned to us.

Rachel smiled at him. "We'll call you when we have results have a nice day."

When he left the room we all looked at each other. "He's it. He has to be. He was really good."

"Next!" I screamed out.

"Hello."

Oh c'mon.

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A/N

Hey guys sorry for not posting in a while. But here it is. I didn't like this chapter so much. But anyway. Here.

-kitty