Indecorous

Chapter Twenty-One: Back to the Routine

As the days past, the surging heartache started to decrease, allowing my bubbly persona to be somewhat resurrected. Aviary tried her best to help me forget his handsome face, trying to pry me out of the apartment I had been cooped up in for a week now. She even walked in my room, heels on and everything, grabbing my foot from under my covers and yanking me off my mattress. Hell, she slid the whole mattress off the frame and made me tumble into her, knocking us both down.

I knew her efforts were from her good heart, but quite frankly, I wasn't in the mood to be shitfaced again. I knew if I had been in that mindset of loopiness, I would either: fuck a random guy and compare him to James, or cry the whole damn time about James. Therefore, it was a lose-lose.

Besides Aviary's urging ways and seeing my brother pop in a few times (that will still take some getting used to) I had discovered from Westin that James called Vanessa. Supposedly, he had told her that I had worked this week (which I didn't, I was draped over my bed watching sappy movies) and that he decided to terminate the article. He had said he felt that it was too much at the moment and that I did a great job while I was working there.

It wasn't entirely shocking to find this out, but it did assert that he probably felt some type of guilt or solitude for me. Which also confirmed that my convictions were sub par and he had used me as a pawn for his mindless revenge.

But after a week of trying my best to forget about the guy and glossing over the revenge plan countless times, it started to not burn as much. My mind started to grow downright insensible, completely unaffected by the heart-wrenching topic. It was sad to any bystanders and observers, seeing me grow completely unaffected by the man that once made my heart swoon.

I mean, if I had seen him in person at this point, I knew I wouldn't be able to take it. But thinking about him after these past two weeks, started to become normalized and nonchalant.

Thus, when I walked in my first day back to my actual office, greeting my coworkers with various hellos and it's-good-to-see-you-again-s, it wasn't as difficult. A few of them would inquire about his personality and overall how it went, and I would just lightly brush it off, telling them the most bleek, ingenuine response.

My keys jingled against the door handle as I balanced my coffee, my purse, and my notebook, absurdly trying to pry the metal key into the keyhole. After a moment, I was successful and I swung open my door, seeing everything exactly as I left it. That was until my eyes brushed over the gorgeous roses that were placed right in the center of my desk.

They were a beautiful white, brightening up my sort of unemotional room.

I had silently hoped to God that they weren't from him, knowing I would probably go through the whole course of emotions again. This caused my steps to be sort of hesitated, acting as though the damn flowers were his brooding face.

I set my stuff down in the available space on my desk, letting out a small huff as I grasped the tiny card off the top of the flowers. I brought the tiny, printed letter up to my eyes, sucking in an unconscious deep breath.

Welcome back, Amelia. This whole thing was my fault. I'm sorry you had to go through that and I just hope you know you deserve the world. -West

A small smile curled onto my red painted lips, allowing the anticipation and anxiety to be relieved. But there was also this minor disappointment in my heart as I guess I was also mutely hoping it was him.

This brought a small, unsolicited frown to my lips.

"I hope you like roses," My eyes were warmed with Westin's charming smile, making my frown disintegrate. He stepped into my office with his usual, heartly brown eyes and his gelled chocolate hair. He had been wearing a suit I'd never seen before, tight and drawing out his lengthy toned body. It was a heathered grey color, while his tie was a deep rouge shade that matched my lipstick.

I brought a beam to my lips and wrapped my frail fingers around the glass vase, "they're beautiful, Westin. You didn't have to do that."

He wore this sympathetic smile on his plush lips, "Amelia, I-"

"It's ok, West, really. This isn't your fault." I set his note delicately on my desk and rounded it, seeing his brown eyes watching my every move. He quirked his bushy brow, intensely watching me as I made my way towards him.

When I approached his slender body, I wrapped my arms around tautly, knowing his gestures were pure and his heart was in the right place. He seemed to be the only man that was really emotional and expressive at the moment, making me feel sort of secured. He wrapped his arms over my shoulders since he was the literal size of a tree.

After a moment, I disengaged and took a step back, gazing him in his eyes. He kept this smile on his face before suddenly, it was like this emotion and thought passed through his eyes. He quickly tried to cover it, but was as easy to read as I book. I furrowed my brows in question, discerning his nervous gestures.

He ran his hand across the back of his neck as if he was having this internal battle within himself.

"I-um," He stuttered, not quite connecting with my eyes, "There's this dinner tomorrow night-but don't take me the wrong way, I know you're beyond hurt right now and this probably isn't the right thing to do..." He trailed off, leaving me completely intrigued.

He observed my emotions, not quite seeing the one he was looking for, thus continuing, "I just want James to know that you're so much more than just his idiotic plan, that you don't need him the way he thinks you do. So, anyways, there's this dinner at our parent's house and I think him and Charlotte are going. I-I was thinking maybe-possibly-you could go with me? It will be like our little secret revenge."

I was utterly shocked, feeling my eyes widen and my pulse beginning to grow even more uneasy than it already was. Could I handle seeing him with his new girl, let alone even seeing his face? Was it wrong that there was this burning desire to get back at him? Or was I just hoping that he would show some sort of interest and jealousy as a sense of reassurance that there was actually something there.

I fidgeted with my fingers, turning away from Westin and staring out the large window that definitely wasn't anything near to James's. But it was a view, and I was content to adore it everyday that it caught my eye.

"I don't know if i'm ready, Westin-to see him with her again." I slowly take a glance towards his direction, seeing his eyes read true understandment while his head nodded.

"I get that," He paused, "But if you change your mind, just let me know. I'll make today pretty easy for you."

I chuckled and he gave me a non flirtatious wink, more of a 'I-got-your-back' kind of thing. He gave me a curt nod before departing out of the room, shutting the door as softly as he could muster and leaving me in this odd, brooding silence.