Tordtom oneshots

Tom's Crazy Family

Just a cute thing I thought of doing. Tord meeting Tom's parents. Not the bowling ball and pineapple. The human ones. There will be no non human parents instead, Tom's mom is a bowling star and Tom's dad is in the pineapple business.

Tord had proposed to Tom 5 month ago. He hadn't met Tom's family yet so he thought it was time. As the Red Leader he has to go into unknown things without any fear. But he was terrified.
"Honey calm down. It's fine." Tom said calmly.
"What if your family doesn't like me? What if they think I'm a homicidle maniac? What if they ask me why I'm conquering the world? Or why I want to marry you?" Tord freaked out.
"You're going to be fine. I'll be right there next to you." Tom said.
"Yeah you're right." Tord said calmer.
Paul was driving to the address Tom gave him. He felt awkward in this conversation. When he met Patryck's parents they seemed nice.
"Sir if I could put some input into this conversation. When I met Patryck's parents they were nice and supportive. I was exactly like you. Actually. You just got to show them you love their son very much and don't tell them what happened with your eye and arm. I think that's a story you should hold off until after you're married." Paul explained.
"Thanks Paul, but we all don't have fleek eyebrows like you." Tord laughed.
Paul chuckled.
"You're right sir. It might have been my smabulous eyebrows." Paul laughed.
Tom kissed Tord's check and cuddled with him.
"You'll do Fine. My family is a little crazy anyway." Tom whispered.
Tord cuddled his boyfriend. I attempted to put the word you use when you get engaged. But it auto corrected to Beyoncé.
Paul drove another 10 minuets and stopped.
"We're here boss." Paul said.
"Thank you Paul. We'll call you when we need picked up." Tom said.
Paul nodded as Tom helped his scared boyfriend out of the car. Paul drove off after they were both out and laughed all the way back to the base.
Tom took Tord's hand a lead him up to the door. Tom rang the doorbell and waited.
"You'll be fine calm down." Tom said calmly.
Tord nodded and smiled. Tom knew it was a fake one, but it was better than nothing.
A lady in her 50's opened the door.
"TOM! I haven't seen you in ages." She said smiling.
She looked over to the frightened norski.
"Come on Commie." Tom pulled on his arm.
"Jehovah. I can't." Tord said.
"I can't carry you. You're 8 inches taller than me." Tom said frowning.
"Okay Thomas. I'll try." Tord smiled.
Tom smiled and pulled Tord inside.
"Everyone's in the kitchen Tom. They were so excited when they heard you were engaged." The lady smiled, "I'm Tammy by the way. Nice to meet you."
"Hi. I'm Tord." The norski said shaking.
Tammy smiled and lead them to the kitchen.
"Guys, guess who I found out on the street." Tammy smiled.
"Tom!" A man smiled.
"Hi dad." Tom said blushing.
"Who's this little bro." A girl said.
"This is Tord." Tom blushed.
"Hi I'm Samantha you can call me Sam." She said.
Tord nodded.
"So, you're my big brothers boyfriend." A guy said.
"Yeah? Why?" Tord asked.
"Hey Tom always knew you were gay!" He yelled.
Tom blushed harder.
"Tarry that wasn't nice." Tammy scolded.
"He always was gay though mom. Even in high school." Tarry said.
"Did you hide your sexuality from me Thomas?" Tord asked.
"No. I hated you and wanted you to go back to Norway." Tom blushed.
His face was deep red. Tord thought of something, but decided against it.
"Why do you call him Thomas? I thought you hated being called that." Tarry asked.
"He did it to piss me off when we were roommates with Edd and Matt." Tom answered.
"Did you guys just start dating then? I thought you lived with Edd and Matt all this time?" Tammy asked.
"No I moved out after I became possessed." Tom said.
"Possessed. Wow really." Tarry smiled.
"You aren't possessed Thomas. We've been over this. It's your monster DNA." Tord explained.
The all looked over to Tammy.
"He's your son." Chris said.
"He's also your son." Tammy said with sass.
"Guys don't fight. I just wanted you to meet Tord. It's complicated and classified why I can't see you as often as I used to. Also I have no clue where this DNA came from." Tom explained.
"Okay. Sorry hunny.  We were just really confused." Tammy said.
"I'm going to take a picture and send it to everyone." Sam shrieked.
"Yay more family." Tord smiled.
"I know you seem nervous, but we already told everyone to be respectful of Tom's decision to marry a guy." Tammy smiled.
"It's not that anymore." Tord said.
"Tord it's not about being something is it?" Tom asked.
"It might be." Tord blushed.
"And now it makes sense." Tom said.
"What makes sense?" Tarry asked.
"Tord go on." Tom said.
"You are not serious Tom." Tord said.
"Yes I am." Tom said, "if you don't tomster will maybe accidentally gain control over my body. Might result in losing another arm. I don't know." Tom explained.
"I'm the Red Leader. Thomas is my assistant and I wove him." Tord said.
"Cool. Tom does that mean if he dies you get to be Red Leader?" Tarry asked.
"Yes, but Tord is doing a fine job." Tom explained.
"Another question. What's with the eye and the arm." Tarry asked.
"And then Tord magical disappeared into the empty abyss he calls his life." Tord said.
"An explosion happened. Someone fired a harpoon at him and there was a very combustible thing right there and it exploded. I didn't see it, but that's why harpoons are banned in the Army base." Tom explained.
"The real story Tom." Chris demanded.
"How did you know I was lying!" Tom yelled.
"I didn't." Chris said.
"THOMAS!" Tord yelled.
"Sorry. Reverse psychology. He's really good at it." Tom said.
"Fine. I came back to the house to get something I was being a big jerk bla bla bla. I may have almost killed Tom. He retaliated and hit an engine almost going through my heart. I moved. I was fine. The thing exploded and boom no arm no eye." Tord explained.
"Define big jerk." Tarry asked.
"I may have caused Tom to move out of Edd's house." Tord explained.
"Hey great idea. How about I tell you I forgive him. Like all the time." Tom said.
"Wow you have a great relationship." Tarry said.
"It's great." Tord smiled.
"Tom hunny. Are you in your right mind to be crazy enough to marry him." Tammy asked.
"Yes. I love him. Even though he's dumb and makes mistakes I still love him." Tom explained.
"What mistakes has he made the month." Tarry asked.
Tom blushed. November, December, and January were his heat months. It was over the second week in November, because someone couldn't keep their hands to themselves. Tom's family didn't know he went through heat anyway.
"He gave me the wrong files to organize. So I had to do it all again." Tom said.
"We both know that's not the biggest one I made this month." Tord smirked.
"I hate you." Tom growled.
"I love you too Tom." Tord smiled.
"I pretty sure he said hate instead of love." Sam said.
"I know what he means. He's just being moody." Tord said.
"Why are you being moody Tom?" Tarry asked.
"No reason. (Except being pregnant)" Tom said.
"There is a reason and if you don't start talking you're going to your room." Tammy said.
"I'm an adult! Mom!" Tom yelled.
"He's pregnant." Tord explained.
Tammy screamed of joy and a face like 'you made love before you were married!!'.
"Tord!" Tom yelled. He was blushing again.
"How is he pregnant?" Tarry asked.
"Heat. Sense he's a monster. He can reproduce with a man. Also it was my fault. I forgot he was in heat." Tord blushed.
"Was that a stupid thing he did this month?" Tammy asked.
"Yep." Tom said, "Edd and Matt are going to kill you."
The rest of Tom's family arrived and they were okay with Tord. They didn't tell the rest of the family that he was pregnant until Tarry told them all when they were about to eat. Tord got his phone and call Paul after that.
Expecting to be stabbed multiple times. He ran to the bathroom.
"Tord come out." Tom begged.
"No not until I know I'm safe." Tord whined.
"You are safe. I told them Tarry was just looking for a way to get you kicked out. Or horribly stabbed." Tom explained.
Tord opened the door to see a smiling Tom.
"Okay let's finish this. When Paul shows up get in the car and tell them you are pregnant." Tord whispered.
Tom giggled and nodded. He had a better plan though.
They both sat back down.
"You guys know the pond in the back of the house?" Tom asked.
"Yeah." Everyone said.
"Tord go take off your shirt and pants and go stand on the dock. We'll be out in a bit." Tom smiled.
"It's the middle of November!" Tammy yelled.
"I did this in Norway all the time. Don't worry." Tord said winking.
"Okay he's out on the dock. Don't kill him. I'm actually pregnant. You guys can push him in the pond if you want." Tom grinned.
Everyone walked out to the pond.
Tammy pushed Tord off the dock and into the water.
"That's for getting my baby pregnant!" Tammy yelled.
"Thomas did you tell her she could do that?" Tord asked.
"What if I did?" Tom mocked.
It evidently was a bad idea to stand on the edge of the dock because next thing Tom knew he was in the water.
"Tord! Why?!" Tom yelled.
"That's for telling them they could push me in." Tord scolded.
Tom rolled his eyes.
"Are you two Okay? Sam asked.
"Yeah I'm fine. Tom might be freezing, but I'm fine." Tord smiled.
"That's because you live in Antarctica." Tom growled.
"Norway. Remember I'm your norski. Your communist. Your red hoodie wearing friend. I'm your future husband and Red Leader." Tord explained.
Tom was on the edge of the pond.
"Come on you big baby." Tom said.
"Okay.  Fine. You better not push me back in. Or I'm dragging you in with me." Tord scolded.
"I can't promise that." Tom smiled.
"You're too cute to be mad at." Tord said.
"Your boyfriends hot." Sam said.
"Sam!" Tammy yelled.
Then Tom and Tord went back to the Army base to tell Edd and Matt, Tom was pregnant.

The end.