Both of their eyes are closed

part 5

"If Luke....doesn't make it," you swallow hard at the thought, Calum continues, "do you plan on keeping the baby?" You feel your eyes go wide. You hadn't thought about what was going to happen to the baby, you were too busy worrying about what was going to happen to Luke.

"I...." You try to answer but you don't know how.

"You don't have to answer if you don't know, but you should think about it." He rubs his thumbs over the back of your hands.

The waitress brings you your food and you eat in silence. Not awkward silence, but a shared thoughtful silence. You quickly finish your small meals and make your way back to the gate, Calum rests his hand in the center of your back and walks at a nice slow pace for you.

When you get back to your seats you see that both Michael and Ashton's eyes are red, and you know they've been crying. Just seeing them like this on top of Calum's question breaks you, and you let go right there in the airport.

"Oh Y/N come here," Michael says. You sit in the seat next to him and cry silently into his shoulder. Ashton sits on the other side of you rubbing you back gently.

"Flight 224 will now begin boarding." You hear the muffled voice sound over the speakers. You have nearly drifted off on Michael's shoulder, he helps you up and you all make your way to the desk.

The flight attendant gives you a sympathetic smile and an understanding nod. You imagine she must have been pregnant before too.

All of the commotion has distracted you for the last ten minutes or so, but now that you are on the plane your nerves kick back in like a tidal wave that nearly knocks you to your knees.

You are beyond terrified of flying. Your breathing shallows and you hands and knees shake.

"Y/N are you alright?" Michael says.

"Uh, yeah I'm okay I just.....hate, hate, hate flying." You take a deep breath to try to calm down as you step into the plane.

"It's okay, you can sit by me. It'll be okay."

"Thanks Mikey," you say smiling a little bit, out of habit, even though he's behind you and can't see you.

"This is our row right here. Would you like the window or the isle seat?"

"Uh...isle, please." They bought seats in first class so there are only four seat per row instead of six.

Michael slides to the window seat and you sit down next to him, shoving your bag under the seat in front of you. Ashton is across the isle from you and Calum is on the other side of him, looking blankly out the window. He hasn't spoken since breakfast.