Mature (book 2)

Chapter 1 - Liam vs Shawn

It's Sunday morning, August 8, Shawn is 21 today.

We haven't talked since we broke up...? I don't really know how to call it. But since then we haven't talked.

He is on tour now, I know Lucas is still talking to him, but I haven't.

I feel really bad. But after what happened. It was all getting way out of control. I couldn't do it anymore. So I told him we should break up.

I regret saying that to him. I miss him. A lot. I miss his touch, his kisses, his hands on my body, his voice, basically him, Just being present in the room.

I want to tell him I'm sorry, I want to call him, And tell him that I was stupid. But I can't do that now.

I have a boyfriend, his name is Liam. He is the sweetest person. He is so loving and charming, very handsome, a good listener, a great cook. Nothing more that a girl could ask for....

Except, he is not Shawn Mendes.

I love Liam, don't get me wrong. But I think because I had feelings for Shawn for so fucking long.... when he kissed me, It was the most magical moment in the world. And I don't know Liam as good as I know Shawn, so when he kisses me, yes it is good, but it's not magical. Sometimes it is, but not all the time. And that's something I miss. That feeling of magic...

Liam and I are celebrating tomorrow 4 months. And in 2 month it will be a year since I last talked to Shawn.

I can't stop thinking about him, everything that I do... he is there. On my Instergram, my explorer is filled with pictures of him, seriously, no matter what I'm doing, he is there. Does that mean something?

"Hey babe." Liam jumps in to the bed next to me. "What?" I say letting go of my phone, kissing him. "I have a surprise for you" he says existed.

"Are you pregnant?" I ask. "No...." he says and we both giggle. "Than What is it?"

He kisses me again and he sits down next to me.

"Ok....." I sit down too, "is everything ok?" I ask.

"I have a surprise" he says. He looks super excited. "What is it?" I ask. He looks way too excited for it to be something small. It must be huge. "Are you sure you're not pregnant?" I ask. "No no." He says Taking a breath, he smiles and than walking out of the room.

What is going on? He walks back in to the room, standing next to the door, with his coat In his hand, no, he is not warring his coat. He is just holding it. Like every other normal person. "Liam, hunny... are you ok?" I ask. "I wanted to wait till your birthday... but I didn't find any good tickets at your birthday. So I decided to give you 2 gifts, this first one is for our 4 months together...."

"Yes?" Are we going to Hawaii? I've never been. I wish we are going to Hawaii. Please please please!!!

"I bought us tickets to Paris for next week." He says. "you didn't" OH MY GOD! Is he really taking me to Paris. I've never been there too. "I did" he says smiling, looking proud at himself.

I stand up and I kiss him. "I love you" I tell him. "Wait that's not it" he says.

"There is more?!??" Oh my god!!!

"I talked to Brittney a few days ago and I asked her which singers you like, I thought maybe we should go to a concert..." he says.

"No way.... thank you thank you thank you" I say hugging and kissing him. "Wait, which singer?!" I can't believe he is taking me to a concert. Holly shit.

"I looked for the singer Brittney said you love. But he isn't preforming in Europe now, we missed it." He says.

"Oh.... but I don't care. I can't believe we are going to Paris" I'm so excited!!!! I kiss him very passionately when he stops me,

"So...." he takes a deep breath and giggles. "that's why, we are going to his concert, not in Europe." He says. "Holy shit. Who is it?" I ask looking In his eyes.

"We are going to see...., Shawn Mendes" he says and I start to scream and jump out of happiness... Wait! Did he say Shawn Mendes...? I stop jumping out of happiness. I started to get excited before I really heard the name he said..

[ See what I meant by Shawn is always in my life somehow...? ]

"What? Brittney said you love him..." Liam says. Of course she said that.

After Shawn and I stopped talking a
I went back to being Brittney's BFF and I told her everything, so she still might be a little mad at me, so that's why when Liam asked her which singer I love... she told him Shawm Mendes. How convenient for her.

"I do, like him. Not, love... him. And I am happy" no. I'm not happy. I don't think I should go to his concert. It will just be awkward.

"I bought us VIP tickets. So we can go backstage and see him, take a photo. And also a Q&A entrance." He says. I'm shocked. I can't believe he did that. That is way too expensive. And wow..... he must really care about me.

"It's on your birthday..." he says "I couldn't wait til your birthday to tell you... I'm sorry"

"Oh my god... no. Thank you" I say. I really am greatfull, but... I don't know, "You don't look very happy, what is it?" He asks. "Nothing. I love you. Thank you so much." I say. "I'm going to take a shower now" I say and I kiss him.

I need to think about all this. I don't really think it's a good idea for us to go that concert, but I feel really bad. It's VIP tickets... that shit is expensive. And he did it out of love, he doesn't know the history I have with him.

"Hey, Michelle... Wait" he stops me. "What?"

"Is everything ok? I thought you would like it.." he says.

"I do, I really really do. You don't even understand how much I appreciate all this. Everything you have done for me. I'm just gonna go take a shower and go to work. I'll come back later, ok?" I kiss him and I walk in the shower.