I always constantly nag myself about spending enough time with each of my friends and making them feel relevant in my life and I've been upset with myself in the past when I haven't hung out with them in a while. but I just recently sat down and realized that I am the only one who ever does the inviting or the worrying about making people feel wanted. and the only reason I haven't hung out with them in a while is because they flake on me or are busy. I understand being busy completely and that's not what upsets me. what upsets me is I'm not sure that they ever nag themselves for the same reason.
this isn't something to create pity or to make anyone upset. I guess it is just me dealing with thoughts. but I wanted to know if anyone feels these things as well or if I just have insomnia and chronic overthinking. and I also wanted to say that in my experience, no matter what you feel or how frustrated friends make you, if you want to keep them, continue to put your effort forwards. you may think that you backing away will make others take the reins and care about your relationship, but in reality, the whole thing will simply fizzle away with your efforts and you will feel as if it is all your fault.
