Vengeance vs. Love

♤《13》 Missing

TRIGGER was caught off guard when Kara asked him about his family. Hindi ito ang kauna-unahang babaeng nagtanong sa kanya ng tungkol sa bagay na iyon. Few of the women he dated in the past did pero agad niyang binabago ang usapan. He wanted to keep his life private.

Hindi niya alam kung bakit ng tanungin siya ni Kara ay hindi siya nagdalawang isip na magkwento dito. Bakit? Dahil kaibigan ang turing niya dito? Because he trusted her? Why he would trust the daughter of his enemy? Damn. It was confusing him but he still found himself telling her everything about him.

"I did everything to please my father but he never appreciated that even once." He paused a moment. "I don't know how it feels like to have a father dahil sa tuwing nakikita ako ni dad ay lagi siyang nakakunot noo. Pero pagdating kay Skyler ay lagi siyang may ngiti sa labi." Napabuntong-hininga siya. "Lagi niyang ipinaparamdam sa kapatid ko kung ganoo niya kamahal ito. I always asked myself why does he love Skyler more than me? 'Di ba pareho lang naman niya kaming anak? Is that how it should be? That's why I strive to be successful like my father." Patuloy niya.

Gusto niyang pigilan ang sarili sa pagkukwento kay Kara. But damn, he couldn't stop his mouth from talking and he hated to admit it but he felt good while talking to her. Gumagaan ang pakiramdam niya ng mga sandaling iyon.

Nilingon niya si Kara. She was looking at him intently. He could read sympathy and sadness in her eyes, was he affecting her that much?

"My mum never failed to show how much she cares and loves me. Sa kanya ako humuhugot ng lakas ng loob noong mga panahong nahihirapan ako. I was only a kid. Siguro mga ten years old ako noon ng magsimula akong magtrabaho at mag-ipon para sa business na alam kong magiging proud si daddy." Itinukod niya ang mga kamay sa buhangin saka tumanaw sa madilim na karagatan. "But you know what? Kahit anong gawin at hirap ang pinagdaanan ko para ma-achieved ang gusto ko sa buhay. It will never be enough. Na-realized ko 'yon dahil hindi nagbago ang tingin sa 'kin dad. He still ignored me na para bang hindi ako nage-exist sa mundong ito." Napangiti siya ng mapait saka nilingon ang dalaga.

Nang mga sandaling iyon ay wala na siyang pakialam if he looked vulnerable in front of her. He was so cautious of letting his guard down most of the time and for years he showed everyone how strong he was. No one saw this side of him except his mommy Sandra. Pero matagal na iyon. It was years ago. Ngayon nalang niya uli naramdan ang ganitong pakiramdam.

Funny to think about being cautious because he was there, in front of the daughter of his family's rival, blabbering about his life.

Nagulat siya ng biglang yumakap si Kara sa kanya.

"I'm sorry, Trigger. I can't imagine kung gaano kahirap para sayo ang mga nangyari. Life is so unfair talaga sometimes." She buried her face in the crook of his neck.

He smiled and wrapped his arms around her. When was the last time he was hugged like this? Five or eight years ago? His mom used to hug him a lot when he was a boy but not anymore. When they saw each other she'd hug him casually and lightly pat his back three times.

"Ituloy mo lang." Bulong nito habang naka-yakap pa rin sa kanya.

Naipikit niya ang mga mata ng tumama ang mainit nitong hininga sa balat niya. Did she knew what kind of effect she was giving him right then?

Nag-angat ito ng mukha. Damn! Her face was so near. His heart started to beat erratically habang nakatitig ito sa kanya.

"Trigger?" Nagtatanong ang mga mata nito.

He sighed deeply para pakalmahin ang sarili. Kara was not helping him here.

"I spent years of my life striving for success. Huminto ako sa pag-aaral. Nagalit si mommy noong una pero naintindihan naman niya kung bakit ko iyon ginawa." Patuloy niya.