Doe In The Meadow | Peeta Mellark

seventeen

I stared at the two purple gleaming fountains in front of the presidential palace. I had been here a few times, and I knew my parents would most likely be here now. My nerves were boiling up inside of me and I felt as if I could puke.

Katniss and Peeta walked with Effie ahead of Tallie and I. It was feeling a bit awkward since my little outburst but Katniss assured it was a reasonable reaction.

We started up the stairs and walked through the garden as Capitol members clapped and stared at us in awe, saying their hellos and smiling. Katniss and Peeta faked their smiles, I on the other hand, remained emotionless, I really just couldn't bring myself to smile anymore.

We made our way through the mansion and to the back courtyard. Effie and Tallie walked off, being distracted by guests. I stood next to Katniss, as Peeta stood on the other side of her. The tension was brutal.

"Arizona," the familiar voice pierced my ears as the three of us turned to see my mother and father, and I noticed Peeta's eyes glance downward.

"Mother." I responded. She looked toward me, disappointed with my look.

"Oh, dear me." She gasped, placing her hands in my hair and "fixing" it. "Really, with the black again?"

"Blame my stylist, mother."  I sighed, growing exhausted of this interaction already. She ignored my comment and looked to Katniss.

"Pleasure." She smiled and I wanted to just scream in her face. My parents despised Katniss. Probably just as much as they apparently hated Peeta. "Mister Mellark." She greeted him in her fake tone as well. "Now, Arizona, I need to discuss some things with you." She began to lead me away from the two but I refused to move my feet.

"I'm sorry, Missus Stark but Ari and I were just about to dance, isn't that right?" I looked to Peeta as the words left his mouth, and I furrowed my brows, confused.

"Uh, yeah." I set down my glass and looked to my father, in a 'fuck you' sort of way, and reached to Peeta's extended hand, grabbing onto it and following him out to the dance floor. "Thanks for that." I whispered as we danced in an awkward manner.

"Anytime." He responded.

Before more words could be spoken, a loud familiar song began to play and we looked to see Snow standing above us from his balcony, spewing more bullshit to everyone. I began to feel sick once more as his speech ended and fireworks began to erupt. I looked around as the people cheered in slow motion practically. Peeta grabbed onto my arm. "Are you alright?" He asked but everything was blurry and scattered. With each crack of the fireworks, the cannons echoed in the back of my mind. Before I knew it, liquid was spewing out of my mouth and onto his jacket. Instead of rushing away in disgust, he held onto me and led me inside to find the nearest restroom where he helped me to the toilet and I let more out.

Once it ended, I leaned against the bathroom wall and sighed. "Does that happen a lot?" He asked, quietly and concerned.

"The nerves." I nodded, not fully telling him the truth of how in every person I saw, I could see the faces of the boy and girl I had killed. It made me physically and mentally sick. "At least once a week." I looked to his shirt to realize I had gotten vomit all over it and began to laugh, for the first time in ages. "I'm so sorry."

"It is not funny." He said in seriousness but at this time I was roaring with laughter and he joined in. As it died down, we just looked to one and other, quietly. "I'm so sorry for leaving." He said in a hushed tone. I desperately wanted to forgive him. I wanted us to be on better terms and I needed some sort of closure.

"It's fine, I understand." I looked to my hands that were in my lap and he placed his on top.

The two of us remained on this bathroom floor for as long as I could remember, in silence, but the silence and him were the most comfort I felt in a very long time.

***

I watched as Peeta and Katniss boarded the train. My parents stood next to me and Peeta gave me one last quick glance, before vanishing. My mother and father led me down the sidewalk as we began our walk home. The tour had been over now and here I just would return to my simplicity which was the Capitol. The following days I heard of the situation with Gale in the square of District 12. The new commander of the peacekeepers whipped the poor boy and Katniss stepped in, getting herself smacked. I saw the footage of Peeta and Haymitch protecting her and Gale, and my heart broke for all of them.

This was a bad situation because Snow was going to take this as a rebellion tactic. She was showing that we could stand up for ourselves, which obviously a dictator like Snow, did not want. So I just waited on what was in store for them, with excruciating anticipation.