"namjoon, i really appreciate your worrying and caring, but..." he inhaled deeply, "i can't tell you anything."
this was just beginning to frustrate namjoon. jin was hiding something, and if he wasn't completely sold on it before, then now he definitely was.
"why is that?" namjoon almost immediately snaps back. oh shit, that sounded rude, he embarrassedly realizes right after the words left his mouth. jin weakly rakes a hand through his hair, swiping away the sweaty bangs on his face- that had been caused by his pleasant fever. "because it's embarrassing and stupid" jin concludes, hoping that namjoon could just forget about the topic and move on. "not to sound rude or anything, but, why are you so interested in the first place?"
"because i care. because it's not right to see you like this every day and not even try to help. all i want is to help you, jin. you need to get some sleep." the younger defends. now jin felt bad. namjoon lowers his volume, "and i know that i'm not exactly someone you'd want to open up to - mainly because we just met - so i understand if that's why you aren't comfortable with telling me" he says, shyly.
"no, that's not it at all, it's just... it's super embarrassing, i guess." jin comforts.
was he really going to do this? reveal his biggest insecurity to someone he'd just met? unfortunately, jin knew that in the end, the answer was yes.
"it's something i'm really insecure about, so you have to swear you won't tell anyone." jin holds out his pinky, feeling a bit less nervous when namjoon's pinky wraps around his. namjoon could tell that jin was still a bit unsure about telling him, and that's the last thing he wanted. "just tell me super fast... act as if, as if you're ripping off a bandage" the younger man encourages, only for jin to correct him. "i actually peel my bandages off slowly" namjoon gives him a puzzled look. who rips their bandages off slowly?
"you know what i mean" he rolls his eyes, playfully. jin takes a deep breath, and exhales slowly. just rip off the bandage, right? "it's because of rj." he throws out, nervously. "what i mean by that is..., i have a stuffed animal - rj - and i've been sleeping with him ever since i was a little boy, even younger than miyoon. and so i've gotten super attached to it because it makes me feel safe. i don't know how to explain it, but it just does. i hate sleeping alone, it's my biggest fear. i can't sleep alone without waking up in the middle of the night, having nightmares. and i lost him, so now i can't get any sleep. i know it's kind of weird for a grown man like me to not be able to sleep without a stuffed animal, but that's just how it is" the elder let out.
his cheeks began to turn pink and at this point, he didn't know if the cause was from his confession or his fever.
namjoon was speechless. he'd never seen jin like that. in a way of having such a strong possession for something so adorable and cute.
"it's not weird at all" he finally spoke out. jin stops eating his donut, looking toward the man. "w-what?" "not being able to grow out of something is completely normal. it's not embarrassing, and i understand what you mean." jin felt a weight being lifted off of his broad shoulders; he'd just told namjoon something he dreaded to ever tell the man, and his reaction was completely normal. "really? you don't think it's babyish? or even dumb?" "no, not at all. but if it's affecting your ability to properly sleep, then you really should be a bit concerned." jin nods, shyly. "yeah, i know"
"do you remember how long he's been lost for?" namjoon asks, now curious. "about 8 days, now" he nonchalantly replies. the younger's eyes go wide. "you haven't been able to get proper sleep in eight days?!" namjoon rephrased, shockingly. jin didn't respond. he didn't even notice how long it's been and now that he's hearing it out loud, it really does sound bad. then namjoon got an idea.
"you can come stay with me until you find rj. whoever you're staying with right now clearly doesn't seem to care much about your sleeping situation, so i will." jin's eyes go large. "wh-" "you can sleep with koya until you figure everything out. at least you'll be able to get some sleep" namjoon cuts him off, proud of what he'd just proposed.
