Silenced

Chapter 38.

"Uhhh." Emily said as she looked at me with wide eyes. "Nothing? We were having some girl talk." Emily sad.

Silas glanced between us before going to the coffee pot. He opened the cabinet above it and scowled.

"Something wrong?" Emily asked.

"He stole it." Silas muttered going to the fridge instead.

"Who stole what?" Emily asked.

"Matthew took all of my coffee. And my meat." Silas grumbled.

'And salt.' I signed. 

"And salt." He repeated agreeing with me.

"Why?" Emily asked.

"It's bad for us."

"For us or for you?" Emily asked.

Silas leaned back to glare at Emily for a moment before turning his attention to me.

"You look like you're feeling better." He said, "How did you sleep?"

I felt my cheeks heating up again under both of their gazes. Silas expression flashed briefly with a smirk before he turned back to the fridge. I stared at the door for a moment as if I could see through it to figure out what his smirk meant. I couldn't. 

I dared a glance in Emily's direction. She was staring at me with her mouth open slightly in shock. She pointed to Silas' back as he headed out of the kitchen. I bit my lip and covered my cheeks to hide the spreading redness. Emily clasped her hand over her mouth. She pulled it away several times to speak but each time she changed her mind and put it back over her mouth.

'That bad?' I asked.

She shook her head no but didn't remove her hand to speak.

'I'm sure it was just because of the situation. I don't think it has anything to do with him specifically except that his scent was everywhere. I mean I don't even know him well enough to be like... interested in... especially after...' I signed quickly in an attempt to explain.

"I'm sorry. I'm freaking out, in a good way. I think... I just... Uhm... Silas?" She paused shaking her head. She took a deep breath.

"Ok. So, you had a sexy dream about Silas last night because you fell asleep in his bed and his scent was everywhere?" She asked carefully for clarification.

I nodded.

"What uhm... What exactly is his 'scent' like?" She asked curiously.

'Like the forest mostly, maybe a little rain too? And occasionally mixed with warm coffee.' I signed. 'You can't smell it?'

Emily shook her head slowly.

"Not well enough to describe it like that." She said.

'Maybe you just have to be really close up. Like when he helped with my panic attack.' I signed.

"Maybe..." Emily nodded. "But Silas and I dated in high school before Aaron and I knew. And I still couldn't..." Emily paused shaking her head. "Do you think that maybe there's a little more to your dream than just the scent?" She asked.

I shook my head no.

"Like maybe you like him?" She asked.

'He's an alpha.' I signed. I could never like an alpha like that. Alphas were too much. They were too intense. Too cruel.

"He is a person too and a pretty good one. I know you probably don't want to think much on it now since we don't know if he likes you but if you're having dreams like this maybe some part of you is interested in him." She said.

'It was only one dream.' I signed nervously.

"He hasn't been in any of your dreams before?" She asked.

My eyes widened as I thought about it. Emily nodded slowly as she took in my expression.

"Was his scent there every time?" She asked.

I shook my head no.

"So yeah... Maybe his scent had something to do with the intensity of your dream but...he's on your mind more than you are acknowledging." She said.

'Why?' I asked worried. 'I'm not interested in anything physical or relationship wise. And why him? He's the alpha here. I could never...' My eyes teared up as my thoughts spiraled with all the ways something like this could be a disaster.

"Whoa! Whoa! Rylan it's ok to have a crush. It doesn't have to turn in to anything if you don't want it to." She said.

'What do I do?' I asked.

"What do you want to do?" Emily countered.

'I don't know.' I said honestly.

"Well if you want to know if you like him then you'd have to get to know him better. I think that's the best way to handle this. That way you can see either way what's going on." She said.

'Maybe I should just stay away from him.' I signed.

"That's only going to make your dreams worse because your subconscious will invent the best version of him for you to like." She shook her head.

I nodded slowly as I considered her words. She was probably right.

"Sooo, Aaron and I usually meet Cassy and Silas for a game night at his old apartment. You should come tomorrow night. It will give you a non-alpha picture of Silas and it will let you talk to Cassy. Double win." She said.

I nodded again. It sounded like it would be a disaster but if that's what I needed to get this out of my head then so be it.

"Rylan," Matthew said knocking on the door way. We both looked up at him.

"Are you ready?" He asked. I puffed out my cheeks. It was now or never. I nodded and stood up. I grabbed my plate.

"Leave it. I'll get it." Emily said.

'Thank you.' I signed.

"Good luck..." She said back.