Silenced

Chapter 72.

            It took me several seconds to realize I was staring at Silas. He had one of my hands pressed against his lips. He was watching me slowly becoming aware of my surroundings. I blinked several times and my eyes darted around the room.

"You are in the medical wing. Matthew wanted to keep you close to the office in case there were any complications." Silas spoke quietly.

"Do you remember what happened?" He asked.

I looked back at him. He was still wearing the same clothes as before and I could see the blood on them.

'I was bleeding?' I signed.

"A lot..." He nodded. "Matthew took you in to surgery and we gave you a transfusion... a couple transfusions."

'Why?' I asked. I wasn't asking about the surgery or transfusions. I wanted to know why my body had been bleeding like that.

Silas shook his head.

"They are waiting to tell us until you were awake. Emily and Aaron are asleep on the couch. I didn't tell Cassy or Quinn because I didn't want you overwhelmed with people." He said.

I nodded.

"Do you want me to get Matthew?" He asked.

I nodded again. I wanted to know what was going on.

"Do you want me in the room when he tells you what happened?" He asked.

'And Emily and Aaron.' I nodded. If it was something horrible I didn't want to have to hear it alone or repeat it.

"Ok." He kissed my hand before getting up.

            He came back with Emily and Aaron. He returned to his seat and Emily took the one on the opposite side of me with Aaron standing behind her. She grabbed my hand in a death grip. I squeezed back. I was thankful for the silent support.

"Matthew is right behind us." Silas said.

            We didn't have to wait for more than a moment for Matthew to come in. He glanced at everyone but focused on me.

"Do you want everyone in here?" He asked.

I nodded.

"Ok..." He took a deep breath. "So... the bleeding was actually your uterus hemorrhaging. We cauterized everything we could and gave you a few transfusions. The bleeding has stopped for now but there is a possibility that it may only be a temporary solution."

"Why? What caused her body to react like that?" Aaron demanded. I nodded toward Aaron. Those were my questions as well.

"The internal bleeding was caused by her body going in to heat." Matthew said.

"What?" Aaron and Silas said shocked.

"That's not possible." Emily said.

"I'm not speculating." Matthew held a hand up. "Rylan was experiencing some strange symptoms over the past few weeks. The main one was her core body temperature steadily increasing. We were running tests the latest of which was a hormone test all of which were also elevated. This is consistent with everything that's happened. The bleeding was her body attempting to go into the last stages of heat which she cannot physically do as a human."

"But heat doesn't just stop without a proper mating. How are you going to keep her body from trying again?" Aaron asked.

"He can't." Silas said pinching the bridge of his nose.

"No we can't completely stop it but we can minimize it through hormone injections and of course minimizing exposure to the stimulus." Matthew said.

'What stimulus?' I signed. He wasn't making any sense.

"Me." Silas said. His tone was cold and bitter.

"Avoiding intimate interactions is the safest way to ensure your body doesn't attempt to go into heat again." Matthew agreed.

"With anyone or with Silas?" Emily asked.

"It's hard to say..." Matthew shook his head.

"No it's not." Silas said. "Say it."

"Because you are... a blood match among other similarities it is likely that your hormones caused her body to react as strongly as it did." Matthew sighed.

"And?" Silas demanded. We could all tell that Matthew was holding back information.

"Given the circumstance, if distance is not sufficient enough to alter her hormone levels, it may become necessary to perform a formal rejection to avoid another incident like this. I needn't remind you that the next time something like this happens it could be fetal." Matthew said.

Silas clinched both of his hands in his hair as he took in Matthews words.

I shook my head. He couldn't be serious. He wanted Silas to stay away from me? To reject me?

"That's bullshit!" Aaron growled.

"I don't understand. Why would he have to do a rejection?" Emily said. "Can she not be with a male wolf?"

Matthew shook his head. His eye contact didn't shift from Silas. He was holding something back but whatever it was wasn't just about me.

"I have no reason to believe that Rylan would be unable to have an intimate relationship with another male, any other male..." Matthew said.

"Fuck!" Silas growled standing up and shoving his chair over.

'We'll figure this out. ' I grabbed his shirt with one hand and signed with the other.

"There has to be another way." Aaron said.

"If there was another way I would tell you. As it is I recommend not spending more than 10 minutes in the same room together and we can resume with rigorous testing once you are stabilized to see exactly where the line is if that's what you really want to do." Matthew said.

'Of course.' I signed. 'We will give it a few days and then we can start testing the lines.'

"No." Silas said. "I'm not going to play some hormonal version of Russian roulette with your life. I can't... I can't lose you again. If not being with you is the only way..." He shook his head.

'No. Please. We can find another way.' I signed.

Silas shook his head and pulled my hand off of his shirt. He brought it to his mouth and kissed it with a sigh.

"Your life comes first Leannan. Always." Silas released my hand and stepped away before I could grab him again.

'Silas!' I signed but his back was already to me as he walked away. I shoved my blankets off and tried to get up but Matthew blocked me. He spoke but I couldn't hear him. My ears were ringing.

"Silas!" I tried to yell but no sound came out. I was crying as I fought for Matthew to let me go. This couldn't be it. I needed him. I loved him and I had never even told him.

~Silas!~ I tried but I couldn't find any links in the haze of medication that still fogged my brain. I couldn't get away from Matthew. I didn't have the strength to fight off a teddy bear let alone a fully-grown werewolf. I heard the door shut at the end of the hall. The quiet click  was like a knife to the chest. It was too late to stop him. He was gone. I sagged against Matthew. My body shook with the force of my sobs. Silas wasn't going to fight for this. He wasn't going to fight for us. I had lost him just like I'd lost everything.

End Part One of Silenced