Back To Life - Kim Jonghyun

Chapter 42

JONGHYUN

"I'm worried that I did something wrong to you and I want to apologize, Jonghyun."

Is the next thing that Eunji texted me during my break and I just saw it now after an hour later. And the next arrives at this very second,

"I'm worried you have no one to talk to."

Taemin approaches me from behind finishing his part of the calendar photo shoot asking me what is up with me checking up on my phone more frequently than before, but I just tell him and the others later on in the day saying that I was just ordering some clothes for my own to wear online and they are probably right at my doorstep now and go home alone after our manager drops me off in front of my apartment. When I get inside my unit, I do not go directly to the kitchen, but instead, I head down to my bedroom and change my outfit for the night. Although I am a bit hungry, I do not eat even some light snacks because the things and worries in my mind are strong enough to block my desires to nourish my body. After changing clothes, I head back to the living room and lie down on my couch.

"Jonghyun-ah...I'm at the parking lot. I need to speak to you."

What a great timing.

Eunji texts me as soon as I rest my back on the couch just for me to stand back up and head down to the parking lot. Walking there with my hoodie on and looking around to see if someone is present somewhere hiding, I approach Eunji fast and quietly.

"Eunji, what are you thinking? Meeting me here-someone might follow us." I say as I whisper to her looking behind her, but seeing nothing, but the lights on the posts.

"I don't know what's happening to you, but for some reason, something tells me that Ruru might bring your happiness back." Ruru then jumps out of her car and barks at the sight of me. Carrying her makes her stop and coos in my arms.

Eunji continues while petting her on her head, "I'm just worried that you have no one to talk to and I want to be here for you, but it feels like I can through Ruru."

"Don't need to be worried about me. You have better things to do, than coming here and bring Ru to me." Looking at Eunji, I can see that her eyes are starting to be watery under the spotlight and in no time, her nose starts to light up red and starts crying.Panicking, I put Ru down and come closer to Eunji, wiping her tears away with my fingers.

"Wh-Why are you crying? You're making me feel guilty for some reason. Stop it."

No matter what I do, I can not seem to make her stop and whenever she looks up just to look at me, I look away because this feels like I have been here before. This situation where Eunji cries so much that I have nothing else to say or do, but to be here present with her. I don't know where this feeling is coming from, but I seem to trust it more every now and then. After for some minutes standing alone with her in an empty parking lot, she finally rests her head against my shoulder, forcing me to hug her so she will be more comfortable,

"I'm worried something bad might happen tonight to you. And I don't know what to do...I'm so frustrated, Jonghyun..." Then, she starts crying even more, but with a smile on her face. She touches my face and kisses my cheek to say goodnight and goodbye, then in no time, I am back inside my apartment unit.

Those words. I have heard it from her before.

After putting Ruru to sleep beside my bed, my head starts to hurt unusually bad and so, I lie down on my bed for good and hoping that this huge headache will ease in the morning.

FLASHBACK

"I'm worried something bad might happen tonight to you." Eunji tells me this as her hug is comforting me while her left hand is busy trying to get the knife out of my hand. At the next scene, maybe minutes later after what happened, I look around my apartment unit's walls and picture frames, seeing nothing, but Eunji and I. One from our first formal meeting with the SHINee members, and the second, is when we were at Jeju Island it seems.