Jimothy:
You fake ass hoe, how dare you abandon me at Jaebum's party?
Consider this friendship canceled
Mr. Crabs:
I'm sorry, but who is this?
***
A crackhead Instagram AU where Namjoon is a laidback idol, and Jimin is a fanboy that just so happens...
Pinky: Alright What the fuck is up Yoongi I require tea
AgustD: I can't believe you've done this
Pinky: Done what?
AgustD: Made an incomplete vine reference
Pinky: Sucks to suck Now spill the tea, I am fucking thirsty
AgustD:
Basically Joon found himself a man
Pinky: That's spicy Wait Imma add gguk
AgustD: But why we have like 10 groupchats like that
Pinky: Why not make it 11?...
Pinky added jjk to the chat
Pinky renamed chat Thirsty Hoes
jjk: Wait why am I here? Why is there another one?
AgustD: That's what I said!
Pinky: Hush Yoongles I'm the hyung so you guys can't question me
AgustD: Like hell I can't question you
jjk: Ooo lil meow meow is feeling feisty
AgustD: I will end you
jjk: I'd like to see you try
Pinky: Y'all need to calm the fuck down Also, Jeongguk could literally break you with his thighs Yoongi
AgustD: Kinky
jjk: Ewwww Wait, so what is this chat for?
Pinky: Well you see, Joonie found himself a man
jjk: Ooooo Who?
AgustD: That Jimothy kid
jjk: Wait, what does he look like? Have y'all even vetted him yet?
Pinky: He isn't an actual dog Jeongguk
AgustD: No dumbass, like, made sure he is a good person
jjk: Jin, did you really not know what I meant by vetted?
Pinky: What I did or did not know is of no importance gguk
AgustD: I honestly don't know how y'all stand each other enough to date
Pinky: Sir, we love each other, and I am sorry that your cold soul can't understand that
AgustD: Pft, I can love people too
jjk: Sure you can Okay, so who's going to check the kid out?
Pinky: I mean, isn't Jimothy his personal? Does he have any pictures of himself?
AgustD: Ummmmm lemme check Nah
jjk: Who are his friends?
Pinky: That kid named Rawr for sure, maybe he has pictures with him?
jjk: Ooo, Jimothy has Rawr tagged in pictures He's pretty hot
AgustD: Jin collect your man
Pinky: Nah, I was gonna say the same thing
AgustD: Y'all are wild
jjk: Or maybe you're just boring WAIT I found a picture!
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
The dude on the right
AgustD: Oh my gosh his hands are so small How the heck is he supposed to dominate Joonie looking like that?
jjk: I don't know, minus the hands he looks pretty daddy to me
Pinky: I'm still really digging the dude on the left gguk We should slide into his dms
jjk: I'm into that
AgustD: Wow, y'all are fucking wild
Pinky: Bitch tell me something I don't know
AgustD: Froot Loops are all the same flavor
Pinky: ...I hate you
***
Is this too fast? I have never done this type of thing before and I have no editor or feedback so I am genuinely clueless as to what I am supposed to be doing
