Tell Me This Is Love! (ImmortalHD FanFic)

Am I Sure?

(Aleks P.O.V)

(Tuesday) 7:30 A.M. Colorado High

"What am I going to do Seamus?!" I yelped.

I went over yesterday's date with Seamus, whom was sitting on a bench at our lunch spot. I was pacing back and forth before him as he watched confusingly.

"What do you mean?" he responded.

I stopped in my steps and faced him. "Kevin put me on spot and made realization dawn upon me. I like Eddie, Seamus. I really like him!"

Still unsure of my frantic actions, Seamus lifted a brow. "And? Is that it? Isn't this a good thing?"

"No!" I shook my head. "Kevin said that I should end my games in leading three guys on and just admit to Eddie! Of course, at first I thought if I did so, everyone's friendship will end up spiraling into turmoil, but he reassured me into thinking otherwise. When that happened, I was so sure of myself but now I feel like I've just gone back to step one again!"

Seamus attempted to put everything into place. I figured so because of the way he nodded slowly in silence. 

"So basically your will was pretty much artificial because you were in the moment," Seamus began analyzing the case, "Now that the time has come, that artificial will broke down into crumbling little pieces. You still think that leading them on is the right thing to do? Am I right?"

I was amazed. For the first time, Seamus was wrong. I groaned as I sat down on the opposite bench. "No, it's just...., I know that I should stop dating them and I also know that I should tell James and Steven the truth, but my problem is Eddie. If I tell him that I really like him, I might end up causing even more trouble."

I felt Seamus' gaze. "I have never been more confused by a person in my life until now. How is this going to cause trouble?"

"I came to realize that I'm exactly like Anthony except even worse," I paused, ready to clean my conscience, "If anything, I don't deserve to be your friend. Anthony ruined a friendship because of one guy, but I'm ruining friendships because of four of them. I've practically replaced Anthony's position and now I know how it feels to be confused; especially when you aren't sure how to respond to the person you like. Anthony wasn't able to get the person he liked because of the same thing I'm doing, yet somehow along the line, my doings didn't get penalized. Even if I did do something bad, I ended up having a sort of happy ending, but Anthony didn't. I already hurt him once, and I don't want to hurt him again."

There was silence between us. I looked up to Seamus whom stared at me blankly. I was hoping for a sort of response but I figured if I was in Seamus' position, I wouldn't know how to respond to a person who constantly dumps their problems on me either.

Seamus clapped his hands slowly. "Wow. Aleks it's like you've become a whole new person. You're seeing from two perspectives before making a choice. I'm really impressed."

Being unable to differentiate between Seamus' sarcasm and literal words is like taking an exam without knowing the lesson; otherwise difficult. "Thanks?" I questioned rather he was complimenting me or not.

"So," he stopped clapping and leaned forward, "I guess this means that you're going to try solving things with Anthony and bring him back into the group, huh?"

I nodded. "Exactly. What do you think? Is it possible?"

Seamus thought over his response. "Maybe. Seeing your resolve, I figure I could give him another chance. At least this problem isn't someone else's."

I smiled brightly. "Thanks Seamus." Even when Seamus wasn't much of any help, he always pulled through somehow. 

"Aleks!" Senior Steven's voiced called. I turned to see the senior paced over to Seamus and I.