Not So Black and White

Chapter 8

That night Mr. Black dropped me off back at home, but before he let me out of the car he handed me a thick envelope. “Do it tonight Ms. Hilder,” I swallowed, “You have an apartment, you have a job coming, you're graduating in three weeks, you can do this.” He reassured me.

“What if something goes wrong? Like he totally freaks out??” I asked desperately.

“You have my cell phone and my home phone, everything will be okay,” He sighed, I didn’t want to leave the warm car. Even though it was early May and we clearly didn’t have the heat on there was something about the air in the car that made it feel warm and safe. I looked up to the window of our living room and saw Leo’s shadow approach. I hoped out and grab the file and thanked Mr. Black one last time.

As I made my way up, I dug my foot a little harder into my step each time. I wanted to feel every inch of this building before it would be taken away. This is where I grew up in a sense. Some of my fondest memories were made her and now with just a couple pieces of paper it would be over. As I entered the door, I prepared myself. Was I going to just set them down and let him figure it out? Was I going to directly confront him? Yet before I could decide the door was opened for me.

“Finally you are home! God, where were you?” Leo asked looking frazzled.

“Doing some errands,” I lied.

“Four hours?” He asked setting down my purse. I watched him glance down at the files in it.

“Yeah with my boards coming up I wanted to study a bit and I had to do some stuff,” He nodded and sat back down.

“Who dropped you off?” He asked sipping his beer.

“Just a study friend,” my face grew hotter with each lie.

“Oh, well there’s some pizza in the fridge,” He responded barely taking his attention from the TV.

“You know I’m just going to get ready for bed, I’m so tired and stuff,” He nodded and barely acknowledged me. I locked the bedroom door and grabbed my suitcase. I started taking all my clothes out of my drawers, stuffing them in my suitcase. I did the same with nearly everything in my closet. This was it, this wasn’t a trip, or a move. It was an end to an era. With every item of clothing I folded I remembered a memory I had with Leo in it. Every pair of shoe had its place in my next suitcase, it fit right along with all my winter sweaters and jeans. Before I knew it I had almost everything packed. I left out the obvious stuff such as photos, pictures, jewelry and make up. Before I could even look at the remaining stuff I heard a bang on my door.

“Anna??” I heard Leo yell and it wasn’t a sober yell either. My heart stopped beating, my world stopped spinning and my stomach dropped. I could fell the blood drain from my face as I turned my body away from the mess I made from packing to see the shadow of the feet below the door. I walked closer trying to figure out a way to hide the fact that I was leaving him. I opened the door to find Leo’s hand gripping the papers.

“Why do you have those? Did you go into my purse?” I asked staring at the papers.

“Yes I did you bitch. You’re divorcing me??” He yelled pushing through, then his eyes fell to the floor. He saw all the suitcases and the emptied closets. “Your leaving already?” I asked as his jaw dropped.

“This wasn’t how I wanted you to find you Leo,” I pleaded. “How long did you look at those,” I asked because I saw empty beer bottles meaning he went through all of them, nursing a beer bottle for every document. There was six separate documents and six empty bottles.

“Long enough to know how much of a bitch you are,” he slurred. I pushed past him and carried my suitcases down to my car. I could hear him yelling as I descended each step. I grabbed the last three bags filled with memories and important documents as he kept yelling. I moved down each step faster as his voice grew louder. I then realized I left my phone in the apartment, this was my chance to say the snotty thing all ex wives say but it couldn’t come out, just

“I hope you find a good lawyer,” was the only thing I could roll off my tongue as I grabbed it. Yet before I could turn around to see his face’s reaction I felt mine. A fist was thrown at my nailing my left jaw.

When I came to, I was knocked on the ground drooling blood. “Babe I’m so sorry, I have no idea what came over me,” I sat up and nodded trying to get him to stop talking. What just happened had to be an accident it just had to be because there was no way that gentle Leo could do such a thing. His eyes were welled up with tears as he held out his hand to lift me up. He carried me over to a chair where I sat dabbing my mouth with a towel. My head felt like a block of cement and I just wanted him to stop talking. “It will never happen again, I’m so sorry,” He blabbed.

“I know, its okay. You were angry and in the moment,” I replied trying to catch my breath. “I just am going to take a shower and go to bed, lets talk about this in the morning.” He nodded and backed off as I carried my heavy body to the bathroom. Luckily tomorrow was Saturday and I had no classes but I had a meeting with Mr. Black at ten am, which barely gives time for the bruise to heal. I striped off my clothes and examined the damage before I got into the shower. It was just one hit to the side of my face. Lip busted, which explains all the blood and a bruise was forming around my cheekbones, which explains the headache.