Calling All Boys (Queen)

Defence Mode.

John's P.O.V.

"Turn this plane around! Turn it around, now!" Roger screeched.

Jim was fumbling with a phone, "Hello?! Freddie?!"

"Jim put the phone down, it won't work on the fucking plane!" Rogers voice continued to get higher and louder.

Brian was shaking his head, "We have to go back and get him, we can't leave just leave him there."

"You mean like you just left him, Brian?!" Roger suddenly burst out, causing a moment of silence between everyone as the guitarist looked up at the drummer with a hurt expression whilst Brian's fucking wife smirked to herself throughout the whole process.

"That's not fair..." Bri whispered.

"Not fair?! But what you did to Freddie, you think that's fair?!" Roger was stood up, in Brian's face.

Perhaps one of the first times that Brian had actually been confronted about him leaving Freddie, properly.

But it wasn't the right time.

And it certainly wasn't the right place.

All this was happening whilst I stared out of the window, chewing on my fingernails in silence after walking onto the plane, looking ashen...without Freddie.

Watching the land beneath us disappear and then turn into the big blue sea...confirming to me that we had indeed just left Freddie on that piece of land...all on his own.

But I suddenly snapped after no longer wanting to hear their pathetic bickering, standing up, "Oh fuck off, Roger! Do you not think that you're part of the problem?! You're the one who hasn't left him alone whilst we've been here, is there any fucking wonder why he wants to be on his own?!"

Another, stunned silence as they all stared at me wide eyed at my outburst, my breathing irregular, my fists clenched, my jaw tight.

Roger's face had turned bright red.

"Really." Brian replied mockingly, an eyebrow raised at the shifty blonde.

"Well you weren't going to comfort him, were you?" Roger was instantly on defence mode as I sat back down and rolled my eyes.

"Yeah. Giving him lectures, throwing jealous strops, having him basically carry you back to the hotel when you were too drunk...really fucking comforting, Roger." I murmured, just loud enough for everyone to hear.

I was tired. I was so fucking tired of keeping quiet and trying to keep the peace. I felt like I had failed Freddie, these two weeks away from Brian were supposed to bring him some closure, we were supposed to take him out to have fun and help him forget about some things for a while...I had sincerely tried to fullfill that promise...but to now be on this plane, flying back to London without Freddie, was not part of the plan.

He was supposed to come back home with us feeling positive about the future life, feeling as though he can carry on without Brian, he can have good times and he can start to smile again...

But he didn't even want to come home with us to give that a go.

We were part of the problem.

I tried to keep my distance, let him have his space, I've always told Roger to let him do his own thing, he's independent, he knows what he's doing...Freddie doesn't like to be hounded and pestered by people and Roger has been doing exactly that.

Roger has been suffocating him. Being bitchy because Fred hasn't been giving in to his desires, hasn't been acknowledging or acting upon the fact that Roger likes him.