Please Talk To Me ~ SalXTravis Soulmate AU

\\6//

I wake up on the bathroom floor, still. I didn't bandage my arm good the night before, so there's dried blood all over me and my arm.

"Fuck me," I hiss out when I peel the poorly wrapped bandage off.

There's blood on the floor, too, so I hurry to clean it before Dad asks questions.

I also bandage my arm better than it was before. It stings like hell, but I get through it gritting my teeth the whole way.

There's an orange-ish stain left on the tiles, but it's hardly noticeable unless you pay attention.

I slowly take off my sweatshirt and pants to put on some new clothes. Spring break is this week, so I just throw on some white sweatpants and a tighter black tank top.

I comb out my curly hair a bit, but give up in the end. It looks fine.

Since it's still pretty early, I can't talk to Larry or anything, so I just watch some TV mindlessly.

The more time my mind has to wander, the more bad thoughts filter in.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!! FUCK!! My breathing spikes up a bit. He knows I hurt myself.

I cover my mouth with my hand and start crying softly.

He's going to hate me. After him getting that beating, I just put him through my pain. I'm so fucking selfish!

I end up curled up in a ball on the couch hugging my knees to my chest.

My heart is beating lightning fast, and my breath comes out in short waves. The couch is getting wet from my tears.

My crying doesn't help anything. Maybe...it doesn't work for self hurt? Sal, stop crying.

I try to stop the waterfall that was leaking out of my eyes. It shows weakness, I know. I know that it won't help my situation.

I just lay on the couch for a while when I stop crying. I think I doze off sometimes, but I can't tell.

There's a tingly feeling on my right arm. I'm scared to look. There's a single word that makes me feel so much.

Why?

I start crying again at what I caused. He felt it. I've done it before, but that was before he started talking to me. Same with his beatings...I would ask him about it, and he didn't answer.

Another message comes through.

Why do you do this to yourself?

I find a pen on the coffee table and write back.

im sorry

My handwriting is more shaky than last time, but it looks readable.

you must hate me now

I don't hate you..I never could. I'm worried for you.

im sorry

Stop apologizing for something that's not entirely your fault, please.

but its all my fault if i were stronger i couldve held myself back again

Some tears leak onto my arm and smudge the ink a bit. I aggressively wipe the tears away. I also push my fluffy hair back behind my ear.

People can't control their mind easily sometimes. You will slip up from time to time, and that's fine.

I smile and think about his words. I'm about to write back, but I don't have any space to write on. I need to get a Lover's Booklet.

A Lover's Booklet is basically a diary of sorts that you can use to talk to your soulmate--only if they have one, too. Of course, they're pretty pricey since a certified person has to give it the power to connect with your soulmate. Two books are made with the same core material, giving them that power, then it has to be activated by DNA.

im gonna buy and send you a lovers booklet

That was quite a topic change. Really? But..my father.

dont worry, ill put a cross on the cover or something

My handwriting is smaller since I'm out of room. I start rubbing off the older messages and writing there.

write a good address thing on here clearly so i can send it to you

Okay: P.O box 279

thanks, and thank you, seriously

There's no response, but maybe he just got busy.

I nod to myself and pull on a hoodie over my tank top. I also tame my mane enough to put it up in my signature pig-tails.

I eventually force myself to clip on my prosthetic. Wait, I really don't know where they sell these things.

By now, it's about 9am, so Todd should definitely be up. I decide to call him.

He answers within the first two rings.

"Morning, Sal," he sounds groggy, but not really sleepy.

"Heya, Todd,"

There's some papers rustling in the back ground, "What can I help you with?"

"Wanna go out to the shop with me?" I slip on my sneakers.

"Sure, but why?"

The doorknob jingles, "I'll tell you outside, meet me out front," I hang up quickly.

Dad could be stressed or hungover, so I don't want to annoy him. I quickly say bye to him and walk out after making sure I have my phone and wallet.

I only have to wait a little while for Todd to come outside.

"So, I need to buy a couple Lover's Booklets," I say as we start walking. "..and I don't know where they sell them,"

He chuckles as I admit that. "They're basically at every big market, but I'm already out here so I might as well travel with you,"

I'm a little embarrassed, but it's nice, just talking with a friend normally and not worrying about much.

"Neil's actually going to introduce me to his parents soon," Todd exclaims, completely overjoyed.

They've been together for over a year, but Neil's parents are away for work a lot. I'm glad that they're finally gonna meet his wonderful boyfriend.

Everyone else seems happy.

10-6-22 update!! the only major thing i changed here was the address. i thought it was weird that he shared a real address, so its a po box instead!