Collision || Luke Hemmings

did you mean it

It had been three days since I saw him. Three long days consumed by paranoia that I would run into him any time I turned a corner. Every single time I walked into the cafe around the corner to get my coffee part of me was hoping he would just be there, and part of me was hoping that I didn't have to see him again. 

Sara hadn't talked to me much since she held me while I cried all night. I think we were both purposely avoiding each other. It wasn't that I was upset with her, but I was afraid to see Ashton. He always gave me those pitying looks before, I didn't know what that would look like now. I didn't want to know. 

I was perfectly okay with having some space, though. I needed to sort out my head and get my thoughts straight. I was too overwhelmed over the past few days, forcing myself to think of anything other than him. I was avoiding dealing with what happened and I knew it. I just couldn't help it. I avoiding everything growing up, turning to other ways to cope. The scars weren't as bad anymore, but they still burned just thinking about them. 

I was so incredibly sick of this whole back and forth thing that we always seemed to do. I was sick of crying over him and I was sick of being afraid of living my life. 

"Allison?" 

"Huh?" I was snapped from my thoughts as Leah, one of my coworkers, slid up by the side of my desk. Her cheeks were flushed red and I could tell she was breathing heavier than normal. "You okay?" 

"Oh yeah." She muttered, looking over her shoulder before looking back at me. "Have you seen the band that came in to meet with Connor?" I shook my head. "Oh they're all so beautiful." 

"You say that about all the guys that come in." I muttered, chuckling lowly. Leah had been here for about three years, and her favorite part of the job was seeing all the guys coming in hoping to get signed. 

"Yeah... but like they were pretty pretty." She said, trying to emphasize her point. "And I'm pretty sure they're Australian, just like you." I froze temporarily at her words. It couldn't be... but deep down I knew it was. 

"Oh?" 

"Yeah. I'm hoping Connor will let us come in to listen to the demo like he did last time." She continued to ramble on but I couldn't focus on her words. Behind her I could see Michael coming out of the bathroom, wiping his hands on his shirt as he walked back towards my boss' office. He looked different since the last time I saw them. His hair was still a hot mess, but for once it wasn't colored. It was a light blonde, and the snapback he was wearing kept the locks tamed. 

"When did they get here?" I cut Leah off, my heart pounding dangerously in my chest. 

"I think they've been waiting for like a half hour. Connor just let them back. Apparently they sent a demo a few weeks ago but he asked them to record another one in our studio." She shrugged, as if she didn't just cause a slight heart attack in me. Within a few minutes she excused herself to go back to her own desk, my hands shaking as I picked up the piece of paper in front of me. I was supposed to be organizing paperwork for the three groups that had come in last week, but I suddenly couldn't focus. 

I wasn't sure how much time had passed when I found myself looking at Leah once again. She had a giant smile on her face on she grabbed my arm and pulled me up from my chair. I was stumbling over my own two feet as she dragged me behind her. I could see that her mouth was moving, but I wasn't processing anything that she was saying. All I knew is that she was pulling me towards Connor's office, which was the last place I wanted to be. I should've called in sick today. 

When we finally entered the room it was like all the air was sucked out of me. Luke's eyes met mine and went briefly wide before he recovered and looked away from me. It was like everything was moving in slow motion as Leah pulled me to our usual seats behind Connor's desk, my eyes glued to him even though he wasn't looking at me.