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So how's 2019 going so far Pyrite?

Random

Look. I'm one day in and already tired. So I'm going to keep track of this year that will hopefully be better. Yay. I hate this already but I'm going to attempt to write out my issues! Yaaaaaaaaaaay

#diarything #fuckthisshitimout #gayness #ihatemylife #ihatemyself #ihaveissues #lalalamylifeisdying #lookatthesewords #neongravestones #pyrite #pyritealchemist1 #selfharm #suicidalthoughts #swearing #wattpad

My friends are assholes...

17 3 20

by PyriteAlchemist1

by PyriteAlchemist1

long story short, Brandon actually came to school today for the first time in 2-3 weeks.

most of my friends have serious mental health issues they should really get help for.

our school has like three counsellors and a department for school and stress help...

even so, most of them won't go to a fucking counsellor.

you'd think between who-the-fuck-knows how many issues Brandon's got going on, he'd see a counsellor right?

that motherfucker never tells anything about himself. I had to actually make a list of anything i knew about him and its mostly rumours or things he said that i can't back up.

to be honest, the amount of stressful sleep i have issues with because of him...

JUST FUCKING TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG YOU ABSOLUTE DICKHEAD

DONT LEAVE ME REALLY CONFUSED ABOUT EVERYTHING AND STILL FOLLOWING YOU INTO HELL FOR SOME REASON?!?!

i don't even know if he even goes to the counsellor... I'm a really bad friend for someone with absolute raging and painful empathy.

I've got i think three of my friends to go to counselling for their various issues. I actually ran into one of them going to their first appointment because i got the date wrong.

well, the reason all of this is piling out is that,

Brandon is getting a blood test because he might have leukemia...

and i think my emotions can't take all this shit while also going through depression. Its kinda like I'm so full: I'm empty.

and i just want to let it out and cry but I'm dehydrated. at least i drank something today that was liquid. i made a spider out of various sugar substances and a can of coke, poured it into a 7up bottle painstakingly and then drank my 'health tonic' (its called that because it's horrible for your health)

my homeroom played a fun little game of try to work out what the fuck lily made in that dirty water. It was quite entertaining having people yell, question, and think about what was literally a spider in a green bottle.