In the Loving Arms of Servitude

32. Realization

                           
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As the dispersed naira notes slowly glide through the air, the entire world stops before Uju's dismal eyes. Somehow, in the black and white hue of their mint demeanor, she is able to envisage the apparent value of life, love, chastity, loyalty, aspirations, integrity, justice and the truth on earth. As each weakly crisp note gracefully touches the reddened sand, she beholds in their countenance, the apparent value of this world and everything in it. Never before has she loathed the sight of money so much. And never before has she felt so wretched; not because she is a pauper or because she desperately desires riches, but because of the enormous power money has come to possess over human existence. It irks her to know that no matter how much pride or dignity she has, she will eventually have to bend the knee to pick up each and every one of those naira notes, because right now, she is absolutely penniless. She cannot even call for help, because the phone Mr. Akintola gave her is nowhere to be found. So if she hopes to survive, she will need this money. And she'd better hurry too, because leaving them scattered on the floor for too long might tempt even the rats scouring along the streets to steal them. Therefore, with tears still in her eyes, she gradually stands up from the pavement and bends down to pick up each note from the sandy floor. Afterwards, she puts them into her ghana-must-go bag and sits back on the pavement, at which point she starts to think of what to do next.

While Uju sits outside in despair, not many people pass by. It isn't a very busy street. It is a long lonely road where each house has a towering concrete fence and iron gate, with tops beautifully decorated by deadly-sharp barbed wires, in case of robbers. Everyone lives in a fortress really. And they hardly ever come out without their cars, unless they need to purchase something from Iyabeji's provisions store. Speaking of which; the last person Uju wants to see right now is Iyabeji, as she would be more than delighted to feast on the sordid details of Uju's story, her sorrow and her pain, just so that she can circulate the scandalous news. Truth be told, some other passers by will most likely do the same. She believes that perhaps there might be a silver lining after all in the fact that she is here alone. Although, once it gets dark, she fears for her fate. A lonely teenage girl on the streets at night! Who knows what could befall her?

After a while, the sun gradually sets, and the cool evening wind begins to blow. But Uju barely even notices. She simply huddles beside the gate, pondering over her entire life; her devastating past, her woeful present and her bleak future. As she gradually sinks deeper into the abyss of despair, a sort of calming lethargy begins to permeate her mind. It is almost as though she has experienced so much pain, that now, she has lost the ability to feel anything at all, or has simply become so acclimatized to pain, that more of it only makes her slightly weary. She is getting quite sleepy already. Although, as her weakened eyelids start to close gradually, she feels a gentle tap on her shoulder.

"Sisi... You dey sleep?" Yusuf asks with a tender and sympathetic tone, afterwhich Uju looks up at him. Then she sighs and replies feebly, "No o."
Afterwards, she continues staring into space and then sighs again.

Yusuf feels quite sad for Uju. He never really liked her much. And he believes that she never liked him as well. But if there is one thing he has come to realize over time; it is that she is actually a very kind and decent person; more decent than he had hoped anyway. If she weren't, it would have been much easier to watch her get kicked out, and may have subtly appeased his sentimental distaste for her. But right now, she just looks like a poor little thing. And the worst part is, there is nothing he can do to help her out. He himself is a victim of circumstance. But unlike her, he is illiterate. The small room and toilet at this house's gatepost is his only home. And his job as a gatekeeper is the best he can aspire for at the moment. Uju has no idea how much in some ways, he envies her, despite her suffering.
"Wetin you do madam?" he asks, in warm concern. But Uju simply sighs in reply, unable to begin yet another round of that horrible story. She is truly exhausted.