A/N: [This poem is all based on my personal struggles. I know not everyone experiences anxiety the same, but I wrote this in hopes to educate those who don't understand anxiety and to let those who suffer know that they are not alone. And if you are reading this and suffering from anxiety and feel as if you have no where to turn, my messages are open no matter when ❤]
There's a chip on my shoulder
It's called anxiety
I'm here to tell you that it is not quirky or cute
It is not 'just being awkward'
Anxiety is:
Laying in bed at night wondering what I did wrong that day
Not being able to order for myself at restaurants
And rehearsing it over and over like its opening night and my career depends on it when I do have to
My sweaty palms around a group of people bigger than three
Not being able to spend the night at someone else's house because it's an unfamiliar place
Anxiety dreams that wake me up sweating, crying, and curling into my boyfriend's arms
Sometimes not sleeping at all when my boyfriend's away because who's gonna protect me?
Holding my breath at the slightest noise during the night
The anxiety attacks the churn my stomach, stop my breathing, and send pains through my chest
Sometimes while I'm in public
Sometimes while I'm all alone
Not being able to explain to the people I love what's wrong sometimes
Because the truth is, I don't know
Something just feels "off"
Telling myself sometimes that even after years my boyfriend could never love someone like me
Surprisingly, this is a short list
Anxiety is not to be glorified
Now onto all the things I wish I had heard:
You are not alone
You are loved
You are not crazy
You will be okay
YOU ARE READING
consumed
Poetry|3rd place poetry in The Butterfly Awards 2019 🦋| There are times in life where you become consumed by thoughts of many things. Instead of letting them overtake you, express them.
