I have stood in front of a mirror more times than necessary
But almost never for the normal reasons
Only sometimes is it to check my hair or fix that one smudge of eyeliner on my cheek that I'll never figure out how it got there
Instead most times I stand there staring into my reflected eyes
Repeating the same things
Almost like a self-deprecating life mantra
I am fat
I am ugly
I am...blah..blah..blah
Tear myself apart so it wont hurt as much if someone else does
I thought I would become numb to it
But the hurt still finds a way in
Although for some reason, today is different
Today I looked in the mirror and before I even had the chance to repeat the usual another thought came first
I look pretty today
It caught me off guard
Left me almost confused
That's when I realized self love is not an overnight process
To love myself I have to plant the seeds everyday
I have to nourish them even on the days I feel dry and empty
Because my body is a garden filled with so many beautiful treasures
It just took me digging around to find the inhabitable soil
When my flowers bloom I will gather them up into a bouquet
I will sit them on my mantle
And everytime the hurt finds it's way back in I will admire each and every one of those flowers
I will remember the seeds that made them
And I will plant them all over again
YOU ARE READING
consumed
Poetry|3rd place poetry in The Butterfly Awards 2019 🦋| There are times in life where you become consumed by thoughts of many things. Instead of letting them overtake you, express them.
