Ulterior Motives

Chapter 36 Somewhere Over the Rainbow

Natsuki's POV:

I glared at her, the woman that was supposed to be my mother, but hadn't been for eleven God damn years. So many confusing and rather conflicting thoughts were swirling in my head. She sat across from me at some quiet diner where no one else but regulars would probably go. The tables were a rusty blue color and the walls were pink which I guess matched the white and pink booths we were sitting at.

"You've gotten so big." I glared at her, that was a lie. I hadn't grown in years thanks to the husband she fucked up. I glared at her more intently. Biting my tongue to avoid throwing the menu I had clenched in my fists at her stupid face. "You're so beautiful." She added and I started to taste blood, guess I was biting too hard.

"Cut the bullshit June, what the hell do you want?" I growl lowly so the little old ladies running the place don't have a heart attack or overhear our conversation. June looks shocked by my question then a little hurt. Bitch didn't know the meaning of the word hurt.

"I can't just want to see you?" She questioned indignantly and I scoffed at her. This was all a waste of my time.
"And what stopped you from fucking just seeing me the eleven years you were gone huh?" I demanded harshly and she sniffed biting her lip as it trembled slightly.

"Your father didnt-" I cut her off as quick as a crack of a whip because she had no right.

"No, no he did a lot of questionable things, he went downhill, he started drinking, doing drugs, sleeping with every woman within walking distance, blaming me for your goddamn mistakes, hurting me because of you! But I know my papa and if you had actually bothered to try and call he would've let you see me. " I snap harshly my hands were turning white I was so pissed off and hurt and I just wanted to go find Yuri and crawl into her arms and cry. I glare down at the menu bitterly.

"What can I get you ladies started with today?" The little old lady with the silver hair, pink outfit and the southern drawl finally approached our table notebook in hand. Eventhough I felt too sick to eat, I really didn't want to hear June's bullshit excuses so I smiled at the kind woman and said I'd like a coke or Pepsi whichever they had, and I ordered a grilled cheese with fries.

After she took June's order and left, an awkward and painfully thick but sad silence filled our little table.
"Natsuki, I never loved your father..." she whispered and I chuckled sarcastically.
"What a shock, the heartless bitch didn't love us. " I snap and she shakes her head.

"No, I tried to, I really did. My father arranged the marriage and I tried to make it work. Having you helped...for awhile, but Natsuki I was just so unhappy. " she whispered looking at her hands dejectedly and I felt pity for this woman.

"That's sad I'm sorry we were never enough for you. " I hiss clutching my spoon in my fist, since brenda or whatever the waitress' name was took my menu. June sighed softly, almost tired sounding.

"Natsuki that's not it, okay now you wouldn't like it if your father said you couldn't be with that purple haired girlfriend of yours now would you...and arranged for you to marry some man you hardly know. " she tried to get me to empathize for her. I narrowed my eyes.

"Fuck my father, if I wanted to be with Yuri then fuck him, I wouldn't do anything for him. Because unlike you I have enough of a backbone to stand up for the things I love. I wouldn't get married and have a kid trying to please someone!!! Thanks a lot for telling me I'm nothing but a mistake that should've never happened by the way. God you really are mother of the freaking year June!" I'm crying against my better judgement. Damn it why was I crying? I didn't show emotions like this! Especially in front of someone like her. I bury my face in my hands trying to get ahold of myself.