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Chapter 39 - Reluctance

I stared around the cabin blankly, my brain still processing each moment. Each look, each casual touch. How could I have been so frustratingly blind? How would I retain my composure in this setting when all I wanted to do was kiss him quite forcefully and finally hear the words I could already imagine him say:

"Grace, it's amusing, I know. The two of us coming together like this, but I must say that since I came home in the Spring, my feelings have changed towards you. I find myself wishing to be in your presence more often, to feel you in my arms, to tell you finally that...

"Grace, you don't look well. Are you about to be ill?"

My distant gaze fell on L now appearing anxious and my eyes widened. Thank God he wasn't Jude.

I opened my mouth to protest and Polly's sympathetic crooning cut me off. "Aw, the poor girl's got a little motion sickness. Honey, the best thing to do for that is to put your head between your legs and breathe real deep!"

I turned to assure her that I had no need of such maneuvers and Pa noticed my supposed plight. "She does look a little green around the gills. Hey, sonny, give her some of your chocolate bar, that'll help her out!"

"What is this, Harry Potter?" Jude snorted sitting back and crossing his arms, not even bothering to take in the sights. "Since when does chocolate make everything better?"

L and Pa turned to answer him automatically. "Always."

"I-I assure you I do not need anything." I finally found my voice as Caleb's arm wrapped tighter around my shoulders. I suddenly felt much worse.

"Aw Gracie, I should have asked if you get poorly on rides before I got you up here, really." He handed me a white paper bag with an understanding smile. "If you need to be sick, you can do it right in here."

"Oh for God's sake." Jude groaned as I feebly pushed the bag away. At least he understood. "She's not going to be sick!"

"You can't be sure, mate." Caleb answered patiently. "I've seen plenty of people go all ashen like before they got ill. We shouldn't take any chances."

"You've never suffered from motion related nausea before, G." L added his opinion, leaning forward. I could almost see the wheels turning behind his inquisitive eyes. "It must be something else that's causing your symptoms. Like... the company you're currently keeping."

Caleb crushed the bag in his hand "What is that supposed to mean? She was doing fine until you crashed our date! I'd say you're the one making her feel iffy, not me!"

L tilted his head to the side, his expression completely patronizing. "Well I personally possess a frame of reference of Grace's health for almost twenty years. You have one of, what is it, three days? I'm not inclined to believe you."

Caleb huffed and threw the remnants of the sick bag on the floor. "I know enough about her to see when she doesn't want you around. But here you are anyway, turning up like a bad penny like usual."

"I'd rather be useable currency then be unnecessary." L's cool retort followed, and Caleb looked ready to get up out of his seat and do just as Jude had forecasted. I desperately hoped the glass we were enclosed in was fortified.

"Now listen here, Elliott, I've kept my thoughts and comments about you to myself because you mean something to the girls. But you can't be so bloody offensive without some repercussions! I'm going to tell you what I think of you for once and for all!"

I cringed, wishing they'd both stop, but L relaxed and gave him a sardonic smile. "Proceed. I promise every insult you hurl at me will not be original. Not that I'd expect creativity from a market merchant."