Dear Ashton,

18.

Dear Ashton,

Luke has been taking care of me really well.

I haven't thought about cutting anymore, and I'm actually happy again. Crazy right?

I do miss you though Irwin. You always knew how to make me laugh without putting much effort into it. But Luke isn't too bad at it either, I guess there's just a difference to me.

I passed all my finals so now I only have one year left before I transfer into a new cosmopolitan school! 

Michael's newly dyed green hair was what won them over in the end. They said such a strong color coming out flawless and not a spot of light or dark hair, its all neutral and that's what they wanted, I guess. 

I'm thinking of dying my hair back to its normal brown. I've let my roots grow in and the red is starting to look tacky. 

I don't want to get rid of the red you love so much, but it's a time for change don't you agree?

Everything's been changing. We uploaded 'She Looks So Perfect' to our YouTube, and we're getting known Ash. Its exciting. 

Luke and I are together now, and you're with you girlfriend touring the world. 

I'm getting into the school I've always wanted to go to.

Everything is changing. For the both of us, for our mates.

I wrote you a song though Ash. I've hidden it from Luke and the boys considering they most likely wouldn't be happy with it.

I feel bad still. I cried while writing it, but I think I needed to get it out. 

Whatever pain I had been holding in, I got it out. 

I know you'd like it. Its actually pretty good and I don't shit talk in it. 

I promise. 

Maybe you can hear it one day. I'll tell you the name though.

It's called 'Amnesia'.

Well, I gotta go. Its movie night with the guys, and Luke's coming early to help me get food and movies.

I love you Ash.

Love, Riley

xxx