I Never Told You What I Do For A Living {Frerard}

Off The Hook

I never told you what I do for a living

I was still on the boarder about Frank. He should be dead, his cold, lifeless body should be disposed of and he should become forgotten by all.

But, instead of what should have been, it was the complete polar opposite, Frank was still alive and breathing with more knowledge gained than he should have and aware of what I could do and how smart I really was. Obviously my intelligence has deteriorated since I met Frank, my IQ obviously decreasing rapidly because someone unknown was conversing with me.

It was pretty unknown to me, I didn't exactly know how I was supposed to act, what the actual human response was to a stranger making friends with you. I wasn't used to when I actually started getting an education with other kids I was too old to even think about fitting in with any group at lunchtime and I was always the kid that looked like a loser so no one even attempted to accept me into their friendship circle.

I had finished that school year a few months after the torturous loneliness, deciding to just be a dropout and not return for further education, all of my spirits were damaged from such a shitty few months of experience of school that I didn't even want to try with the rest of my life, in fear I didn't want to continue with what I chose after I started it.

Life wasn't all it seemed it would be. From a young age I knew that life wasn't ever going to be fair on me, Mikey, no one. Yes, there were people that got off lucky and made it within the world, actors and actresses, singers, models, creators of magnificent objects, they were the ones that made it, but it must have been hard for them. It was hard for everyone to get where they are, wealthy or not, with a job or not, with a family or not, with an education or not.

I didn't want to be a sheep, I didn't want to follow behind everyone else, I didn't want to copy the rest of humanity and go through the same old boring process of life, be born, spend the most important fifteen or so years of your life wasted on education, get forced into the wider world without the knowledge we actually needed but who the fuck needs to understand bills, taxes, mortgages and loans when you know how the whole fucking respiration system works?

And after you've served the bigger percentage of your life being a law-abiding citizen, serving the work force as well as you could just to keep a roof over your head, you just get thrown aside, put away into a home with money coming through each month, money that you had earned for yourself.

No, that wasn't ever what I wanted to do with my life. Of course when I say that I didn't want to live according to what was expected of you, I also don't mean that I always thought of myself being destined to do what I do now, I just knew I wasn't going to try or go out of my own way to fit into society.

I guess that's the main reason I got confused, scared and defensive when Frank appeared out of no where and tried to become my friend.

Honestly speaking, now I did feel sorry for how I addressed Frank. I reacted wrong and immaturely, I was probably older than the guy and I acted as if I was half my age. Somehow, I was skeptical about how hopeful and optimistic Frank really was if he was willingly holding out on me, he clearly wanted me to be someone he expected me to be, and he also expected for himself to like that person.

Maybe Frank just needed to learn a thing or two about how shitty people really could be and how it was stupid and naïve for him to believe people could be better than they were and to live up to the image that the first impression set upon them.

I tapped against the space bar lightly, enough to make a sound but gently enough to know that none of the spaces were coming through on the home screen Google page, thinking about what I really wanted to do with my time here and what I wanted to do on the computer, even. It wasn't everyday that I had someone approach me and disturb every thought that I owned.

Frank was distracting me from my task. He was distracting me from what I really wanted to do with my life. This man was taking me away from my one true goal, the one thing that I set my mind upon, what I had been preparing myself for for over three years. I've come too far to have some loser rip it all a-

My breath caught, my hands froze, my eyes widened, my heart raced, my brain failed.

It was as if he knew I was there, but he deliberately looked around slowly, his eyes casting a glance around the room before they landed on me and a smile graced upon his lips as he made his way towards my table without buying anything to drink or eat, the same table I was at yesterday and sat opposite me, as I shuffled away from him, hiding my work and shutting the lid of my laptop.

Frank didn't say anything exactly, he just brought his bag up closed to him and ruffled through his things for a moment before pulling out a wad of papers and sliding them across the table to me with a smile, "I didn't look through it just in case it was something personal and something I shouldn't know until you trust me enough."

I snorted, becoming a little more comfortable now that I had my notepad back within my hands but slightly wary of Frank, not entirely believing that he hadn't gone through my notes, knowing how easy it would have been for him to catch a glimpse of whatever it was on the paper and want to continue reading about it.

If was easy for me to continue reading some interesting like what I had wrote done on here, then it would be easy for Frank to continue reading the words.

I put the notepad next to my other stack of papers and looked up at Frank, seeing he was already staring right back at me, his head tilted to the side slightly and a distant look in his eyes. Frank wanted to say something, he just wasn't exactly sure on what it was or how he wanted to tell me his news.

Frank sighed a few moments before looking down at his hands then back up at me, "I think I had a dream about you last night."

I almost choked on my own breathing air, my eyes widening a fraction of a fraction, tilting my head to the side for an explanation, hoping that this was going to be my chance out of being reported to the police and arrested for my breaking in. Of course, I wouldn't get that long in prison, I would get away with a mere few months, a minor slap on the wrists for a minor crime.

Honestly, they will dismiss it quickly and try to find out more about me so even then they wouldn't find out about my extra curricular activities.

"You think? What makes you so unsure whether it was about me or not?" I played it off as if I didn't know what he was talking about, as if I was urging him to tell me about his 'dream' as I took my drink within my hands, putting it up to my lips but didn't do much more than stare at him, "Promise you won't laugh or think I'm weird?"

I nodded for the sake of his childish compromise and put down the cup to stare fully at Frank, "I... I have hallucinations sometimes and I have very... Vivid dreams other times, so I wasn't sure if I had left my room and actually imagined you there, or whether I thought it up whilst I was unconscious. I know it wasn't real because I wouldn't react the way I did."

I snorted, "What? Did you relentlessly hit on me?"

Frank's cheeks lit up red and he looked down, bringing his hands up to cover his face, "Shut up, Gerard." He grumbled with his voice muffled, which made me laugh more and sink back into the seat, knowing I got away with what I done.