I Never Told You What I Do For A Living {Frerard}

Everything Is A Load Of Bullshit

I never told you what I do for a living

A little while went after the phone call between Mikey and I ended and we were still sat down in the park, the sky darkening so parents had taken their kids away from the swing, the slide and climbing frames, soon enough leaving the park practically empty besides Frank, some older kids and I loitering around the park.

I lay back on the floor, putting my feet up on the bar that held up the swings, staring up at the dark grey clouds that were rolling across the sky, looking angry and as if though it was going to start pouring down with rain any minute now. I guess that didn't necessarily care about that at all, we were too busy sitting here and thinking to ourselves with the occasional conversation between us.

"Gee, I have a question."

I tear my gaze away from the skies above me to see that Frank had now moved off of the swing and is now sat cross-legged on the floor beside me, "Fire away, I guess." I turn my head back to it's original position and watch the clouds once more, so much more fascinated by them than anything else in this park that wasn't Frank.

"What's your opinion on God?"

I send a fleeting glance at Frank, seeing that he was genuinely serious with his question so I think about it even though I already knew my answer and I was practically certain that my view on this subject will never change for as long as I am alive, "Why would you ask such a question, Frank? What are you thinking about that would make you wonder about my own faith and beliefs in a higher power than us measly human beings?"

"I dunno, I just grew up with a strict religious background, I was thinking about how different I would have turned out if I was allowed to do a lot of the things other kids could, whether I would be here talking to you or in a much worse position. I wanted to know about your upbringing and what your opinion of religion is, that's all." I nodded at Frank's explanation, pretty impressed that a guy such as Frank would willingly think about something so deep and philosophical, not actually knowing whether or not Frank actually saw my nodding.

"Well..." I start off, then sat up so I also had my legs crossed and my knees were touching Frank's, "No, I don't. Religion is something that has always baffled me to no end. It preaches for peace and love for everyone, but hates anyone that's of a different religion and preaching the same messages, as soon as that love ends up being between two people of the same sex or different races, they throw around the word 'abomination', 'faggot', 'deceased', it's disgusting what religious people do.

"Of course it isn't all religious people, the stupid and disgusting behaviour always outshines the good people, I just do not believe that people should invest their whole life into hoping someone or something is real, praying and worshiping them, and when it comes to them actually needing help from their 'beautiful Lord and saviour', he's nowhere to be found. Isn't God supposed to be everywhere all at once? I'm truly sorry but people are investing all that time into some bullshit story."

Frank nodded when I pause with a smirk on his lips as he gazed up at the sky too, "Honestly," I say slowly, my hands reaching for my sleeve to pick at the loose threads, "I don't want to offend anyone with my opinion, but when I prayed for his help when I truly needed it, I didn't get the help I wanted, the helped I needed. I'm not going to put faith into someone or something that won't help a suffering child. I believe that a lot of things other people think is a load of bullshit."

"That's a pretty big and broad opinion for someone that doesn't want to offend anyone." Frank smiled widely, before squealing a little and wiping his face, looking up at the sky and cringing again. I was about to ask him what was up until I felt raindrops hitting against my face too, making me laugh at how silly Frank was for screaming about a raindrop hitting his cheek.

"What's wrong with rain? Enjoy it, buddy, we may never spend time together again in the rain." Frank stared at me as if I had gone mad before pulling his hood up and over his head, "C'mon, Frankie! You gotta enjoy the rain! You can't enjoy it with a hood up on your head! Take it off!" I laugh, leaning in closer to Frank and reaching out for his hood, adjusting my position so I was on my knees with more balance as I keep laughing, trying to avoid letting Frank from stopping me by grabbing onto my arms and pushing me away.

Both of us were laughing together, Frank still fighting feebly against my halfhearted attempts to get his hood down and I almost seemed to forget that I was in the middle of the park and that the rain was starting to get a lot heavier, soaking through my clothes quite quickly, that I had a crush that was developing on Frank. I almost forgot that all.

"Gee, I can't deal with this rain!" Frank speaks louder so I could hear him over the loud splashing of rain against the tarmac flooring, each of my wrists in each of his hands and me kneeling between his legs, I struggle against his grip dropping and the rest of me going slack. I could literally lean in towards Frank right now and kiss him, he could actually kiss me back and we would be kissing each other. It sounded way too easy for me to go through with and it was so easy to do.

Frank seemed to have the same idea, his face becoming closer to mine and his mouth coming closer to mine. I was so impatient, only now realising that I had wanted to kiss Frank since the first moment I spotted him, I was so impatient that I rushed forwards and pressed my lips to his in an awkward fashion, bumping noses with him and both of us with our eyes wide open and the unexpectedness of how fast this was going to happen.

It only lasted a few seconds before I pull myself back, cursing myself for being such a weird, horny and uncontrollable behaviour as I pushed myself up and off of Frank, wrapping my arms around myself and hugged in the heat, flicking my wet hair that was now hanging in clumpy strings out of my eyes, "I've gotta go, I'm so sorry."

"No, no! Look, my house is only around the corner, please come home with me! I know you live further away than I do, just- please, Gerard." Frank pushes himself up off of the floor and gives me a pleading look, now ignoring the fact that his face, clothes and everything else of his was now drenched from the rain, focussing on how I was shivering in the cold rain.

I watch him for a moment before nodding, letting him lead me towards his house that I can recall was only around the corner from the park we had spent our afternoon at.

Our first date.

God I was going soft already and it's only been a few days with Frank.