simons niece

Chapter 1- funeral and songs

The pain of standing at your own parents funeral at just 15 years of age with my two brothers on either side of me is the worst feeling in the world. Just listening to all of the speeches of people who think they knew my parents is torture when they didn't like my parents they only used them to get money and good presents for birthdays and Christmas. Watching them bury my best friends is not the best feeling, I feel like I am being stabbed a million times in the heart.

*after the funeral*

Josh, Austin and I are all standing at the door of the church while people are telling us how sorry they are for our lose when they really don't care. We were just about to leave when someone called out our names we turned to see an unfamiliar person wearing a grey suit looking very professional "hi I'm Ben" he stuck out his hand as we all shook it "as you all know in your parents will it says that if you guys are under the age of 18 you will have to go live with your uncle in England" he looked at us "but as far as I know only one of you is over 18, am I correct?" He asked "uh yes that would be me" Josh butted in "do you have any plans to look after these two?" He pointed at Austin and I "I actually go to college in London so I can't look after them but I will be close" Josh explained
"ah okay so a plane has already been booked for you two in two days and the will also said to split their money between you three so you will all get $10 000 each but Austins will be going in Amelia's bank account because he doesn't have a bank account and Josh won't be around to give it to him is that alright?" He asked as we all nodded

"Right well that is all I had to say and I am sorry for your lose" Ben nodded walking away.

Josh had to go back to London tonight so he couldn't stay with us. As we got home I hopped into the shower just staring at the wall thinking about everything that has happened, I got out of the shower and made dinner for Austin since it was getting late "aren't you eating dinner Milly?" He looked at me
"no Austin I'm not that hungry so you eat up and go to bed alright" I ruffled his hair walking up to my room. Instead of going to sleep I sat at my desk with my music book in front of me and I started to write songs.

After two hours of writing I wrote three songs they are called 'these four walls', 'forever my father' and 'the best day' they all describe how I feel right now so I went into the spare room which was full of instrument and microphones for me and started making tunes for the songs.

These four walls

I feel so numb

Staring at the shower wall

It's began the feeling that the end has come

And now the waters cold

I tried to eat today

But the lump in my throat got in the way

In this time I've lost all sense of pride

I've called a hundred time

If I hear your voice I'll be fine

And I, I can't come alive

I want the room to take me under

Cause I can't help but wonder

What if I had one more night for goodbye

If you're not here to turn the lights off

I can't sleep

These four walls and me

I lay in bed

Can't seem to leave your side

Your pillows wet

From all these tears I've cried