Only you

Ally

After we stopped at Wendy's and fed Courtney she seemed more human and less gremlin like josh dropped me off at my place before I swung by Courtney's to put on one of her tracksuits my boobs were literally bursting out the top but I knew running into my mother with masons clothes on wasn't worth the
Risk  I told Courtney I would drive through to hers later and stay the night
Truth was I wanted to be alone I had a bitch of a hangover and I wanted too curl into my bed

Stepping at my front porch I waved josh and Courtney off , I stepped through the front door throwing my keys to the bowl on the coffee table , and my bag down  I was shocked to find my mother sitting in the kitchen
"Hey sweetie you have fun with the girls last night? She sat with a coffee cup in her hand and tapped her long red nails along the table
I Gulped I didn't know what type of AnnaLise I would be greeted by today
I was just thankful that I had Changed
She had a light pink silk dressing gown her hair was like mine but much more lighter From the many bleaching attempts It swooped up in a messy but somehow elegant bun still she was beautiful I could see how many people fell for her charm she was stunningly beautiful  slowly cocking her head to the side
" well?" She sounded bored
"Umm yeah it was good , you know usual girls night " i tried to keep my voice calm even though I knew at any given moment she would flip she wouldn't notice the bruise of my head because of the one she gave me on my eye reaching for the counter I pulled out a box of pop tarts my stomach growled i hadn't ate much since the food mason had gave me last night and that didn't really
Count it was a big Chetios grabbing the box turning towards the toaster I could feel my mothers eyes burning in the back of my head I
" Really honey? , I mean there loaded with calories and let's be honest it's
Not As if you can afford an extra few pounds have an apple instead "
" really I don't know why you don't take more pride in your appearance I'm assuming that's Courtney's clothes there barely fitting you , I'm only doing it for your Own benefit " she sighed again putting the pop tarts in the bin , my eyes burned but I wouldn't give her the gratitude of seeing me cry this was another one of her tactics always letting me know how much better I could be she looked at me and smiled handing me an apple my appetite had suddenly vanished
" No thanks I'm really not hungry anymore " I clipped out my head hurt and I wanted sleep
"Fine be a dram queen , what kind of mother would I be if I just sat and let you gorge yourself you alway did like your food my little piggy " she smiled
"Speaking of pigs your father called " she trailed off looking at her perfectly manicured nails my heart sunk , he had called and more importantly he had called her? , why
" what did he say?" I my eyes searched her face looking for some kind of emotion she was like a robot her face was expressionless I hated my father for leaving me but a part of me understood
" well?" My tone was harsh again my heart was racing he had called and she spoke of it as if were nothing I hadn't seen my father in six months he left her but in that process he also left me hurt bit at me again but as hurt and angry as I was at him being left alone with her was the the cruelest of punishment he could of ever done to me
She snapped her head up suprised at my tone I saw the flicker of anger but it was quickly gone
" nothing much he's coming to get more of his stuff , next week he asked if you wanted to go for dinner I told
Him how upset and betrayed you felt that you didn't want to I know you wouldn't want to go and I wasn't letting him hurt you again , and well " she straightened her back up she moved uncomfortably in the chair
" he's filing for a divorce"
" you told him what?!" I snapped how could she that was my decision to make not hers I wanted to see him I wanted to ask why . Why he left me
" I only done what i thought was best for you honey..
" STOP! Just stop lying you didn't to this for me you did that because he left you!! And you wanted to hurt him so  I'm your leverage in your little game" the words tumbled out my mouth before I could stop them
Her face turned to stone I saw the horrible look that washed over her face
"he left us Allison , don't you see has he tried to Contact you?'come see you ? Even a text message ? No I thought not , he doesn't love us he has a whole new family now he's met someone else and your acuusing me of playing games with my own daughter I've never left you I've loved you I had you at sixteen years old my life was over I had dreams I was going places but I gave it all up and for what"'she laughed bitterly
A husband who leaves me for some whore and a daughter who doesn't care or even know the sacrifices I have made for her " she started to cry
" he's got another family "' my heart had broken in that second picturing him with his new family whilst left me
Standing up she touched my face
" see don't you see I do everything for you?' Yes ally he has a new family he's replaced us he said he didn't care if we. We're here whilst he picked his things up it was I that mentioned him to you Sweetie don't you see we weren't good enough" more tears slipped down her face
She had to be lying i couldn't I wouldn't believe her this was another one of her games as if reading my mind she handed me her phone
"'Look ,you know your father isn't into social media but look " she sobbed again
Staring at the photo my heart felt like I did when Brandon left me , there was my dad smiling next to a tall brunette woman his arms wrapped around her waist then another of them kissing , my insides churned it was this woman's profile she had two daughters , i kept scrolling my heart thudding with each photo there they were all together eating food at some
Fancy restaurant then another with them watching a film and my dad smiling eating pizza
Just like he used to with me he was
my dad and here he was with this beautiful family he left me I dropped the phone on the counter before I sat down shock hurt betrayal ever emotion ripped through me
"'See I told you, Sally showed me them she called me yesterday and told me I didn't believe it either honey and of all people sally big mouth , the whole towns gonna talking if sally knows , but the proofs in the pudding" she gestured towards the phone more tears fell from her face before she grabbed me and pulled me in
" oh Allison your all I have left , I won't hurt you like he has hurt us he will regret the day he done this to us " she squeezed me tight
The affection felt foreign my mother wasn't like this she was cruel and malicious but she just looked broken guilt tugged at me , I held her back one tear fell from my eyes i Held the rest in , everyone leaves she was all I had she may have been a shitty
Mother but I had no other family except for my uncle Nate who we hadn't spoken to for years
More sobbing erupted from my mother as she slowly fell to the floor taking me with her
" I know I've been a horrible mother but baby I've been hurting , and I couldn't see past it now it's wake up call things haven't been good for a while and I suppose I could have done better oh Ally you need me baby and I need you we will never leave each other "'she wiped away her tears smiling as she held me closer
Never leave each other her words echoed in my ears
And that's when I knew it she had me
Back where she wanted in control on her side
I felt more alone than ever