Heaven, or Max's Special H*ll? (Dadvid)

Chapter 6 Max dies......

    The funeral was at three o....nah just fucking with you. Max gets sick and only feels like he's dying. You people are going to love this chapter because Max fucking hates his new extended family and every last one of them pays a visit!

Max suddenly groaned as the sensation of having his organs ripped out through his anus rocked through his body. He hadn't felt this bad since he lost his appendix, so unless the surgeon was a real dumbass, he probably just had a stomach ache.

"Max, are you alright?" David asked as he kneeled down to Max's shelf. Yes, Max still slept on a shelf, there very poor and Max doesn't complain much. Not only that, but beds are really expensive, and Max is very small.

David had a lot of skills thanks to all that camp stuff he studies, so he was able to tell that Max only had a simple stomach flu. It was going to pass in a day or two, but it could last longer since Max had his vaccinations so late. He also knew the risk factors to look out for like bloody diarrhea, and a fever over a hundred and two. He couldn't really go off the lethargy and irritability because....it's Max. He was going to be irritable no matter what.

"Im fine...." Max said stubbornly as he ripped himself out of bed. He suddenly threw up on the ground and crashed to his side, fairly pathetically. "Fuck you.....writer....."

"Max, you need to stay here and rest until you feel better!" David said as he tried to sound authoritative. He lifted Max off the ground and put him back on Maxs bed tenderly to keep Maxs stomach from being shaken up too much.

"Fine." Max said. "Just go away."

"Okay Max, but don't be afraid to ask for anything at all!" David said with a smile. "I'm sure that if you take the day off and take it easy, you'll be ready to have more adventures in no time!"

"Fuck off!" Max said annoyed as David tried to put a positive spin on his current state of misery. He dragged his pillow over his head as David began cleaning up the vomit he spat all over the floor.

***

Nikki and Neil waited next to the counter of the blockbuster. They were waiting for Max to come down since he had a plan for messing with the security guards today. Neil even brought the duck tape and lube!

"Hey kids." David said with a smile.

"Hey David, where's Max?" Nikki asked.

"He's feeling a little....under the weather, so I'm afraid you'll have to wait until tomorrow to go on one of your adventures!" David said with a smile. "I'm sure he'll be feeling better by then."

"He's on his period?!" Nikki asked suddenly.

"What?" David said incredulously. "No, he's just has a tummy ache!"

"You probably should phrase it differently around Nikki." Neil pointed out.

"Hey.....hic....brats." Gwen said as she came stumbling into the blockbuster.

"Gwen, have you been....." David glanced at the kids suddenly before helping Gwen stand.

"I said virgin, you fucking....mor....moron." Gwen said as she slurred her words.

"Where were you?" David asked concerned.

"My friend had a....had a...party, but I didn't drink, I said virgin, virgin!" Gwen repeated as she slurred her words some more.

"It must have been a mixup at the bar." David said. Which was technically true, as in Nancy switched there drinks. Nancy needs to mind her own fucking business. Gwen didn't wanna drink because she had tutoring to do.