Be My Mistake - Matty Healy FanFic

Chapter Three

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I hadn't slept much last night. The sight of Matty in his infuriated state had burned itself into the back of my mind and kept me awake.

I had gone out of bed at nine, made myself a cup of coffee and made my way to the park across the street with a blanket and my sketchbook. Drawing calmed me down and it had been a part of my self-therapy since I was little. I was sat on the ground on my blanket, my knees bent so I could use my legs as support for the sketchbook. I was observing and drawing an old lady who was feeding the ducks down by the lake. I couldn't help but smile at the peaceful contrast to the chaos of Matty's tantrum last night. The worst part was, that I wanted not to be bothered but I cared too much not to. I sighed and drew a couple of lines on the paper, when I felt somebody sit down behind me with one leg on each side of me, resting their head against my back. I could tell by the sweet smell of cologne, and the way delicate curls tickled my neck, that it was Matty. I didn't say anything. I just continued drawing. 

"I'm sorry," he mumbled after a couple of minutes. He rested his chin on my shoulder to look at the paper.

 " For what?" I said, pretending not to care. I didn't even turn my head to look at him.

" For yelling at you outside and for causing a scene inside," he stated with a genuine gloomy tone.

" Don't be," I said, throwing the sketchbook to a side and turning around so I was facing him, sitting between his legs. 

" You should feel sorry for yourself though, for ruining you fucking body," I yelled at him. I felt my eyes get glossy and looked down, not wanting him to see. I didn't even know I would react this way. After some time in silence, he leaned back on the blanket, still keeping his eyes on me. He looked ashamed. Like a child who had been caught with his fingers down a jar of biscuits. 

"You just don't understand," he mumbled. I laid down beside him, looking up at the sky. It was a beautiful day actually. For once in the history of British weather, the sky was completely blue without a single cloud, and you could be outside in just your t-shirt. 

" What did you take?" I asked calmly, turning my head to look at him. He didn't move, he just laid there with his eyes closed.

 "Cocaine," he mumbled, making me close my eyes in sadness. 

"Matty.." I sighed, turning onto my stomach, shifting my body weight onto my elbows so I could get a better look of his face. He had had a shower. His hair was damped, and taking last nights events into account, he looked peaceful.

 "Here it comes," he said, opening his eyes lightly to meet mine.

 " Psychology me," he said with a playful smirk. I couldn't help but chuckle. 

" First of," I said, stroking a strand of hair away from his eyes. " I'm pretty sure psychology isn't a verb." He grabbed my hand and held it in his. " And secondly, I'm not gonna 'psychology you'" I mocked, laying back down beside him. He rubbed the back of my hand with his fingers. I didn't mind or think much of it for that matter. 

" But..." I said, turning my face to look at him. He met my eyes.

 " It's all in your head Matty," I stated, smiling lightly. He looked confused. " How?"