One Trip Changed My Life •Book One•

Chapter Sixty-Three

Should I do shoutouts at the end of the chapters? Like ask questions and if you know the answer comment it and I'll give a shoutout. Like it will be random questions or it will be about something that happened in the chapter and etc.

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I woke up to the sound of beeping and quiet conversation. I fluttered open my eyes to see Sam and Colby. They looked at me and smiled. "Hey, how you feeling?" They asked, almost in unison. I giggled and gave a soft smile. "I feel....better, what would be great is a chance to shower?" I lied. On the inside, I was torn apart that I lost the baby. It is heartbreaking. Colby stood to his feet. "Actually, you're in luck because the nurse brought in a new gown and some soaps. I'll help you out if you need." I nodded and sat up a bit.

Sam went to get a nurse so they could take the wires off of me. As soon as they came in, they had a bright smile. "Good morning Alexis, you would like to shower?" I nodded my head and she nodded walking over to me. She took off the wires and helped me stand up and bring me to the bathroom. I stood in front of the mirror and pulled my hair out of my face. My cheeks were red and puffy. Not a pretty site.

I walked over to the shower and soon Colby came walking in. "Don't worry, I have a change of clothes." He said as he stripped down to his boxers. I nodded and slid off the gown, my panties, and bra. I walked into the warm water and instantly felt relief. I closed my eyes and seen images of a baby and instantly opened them. Colby soon got in behind me and kissed my shoulder. Tears were running down my face but it was hard to tell because of the shower water.

I turned and faced Colby, quickly hiding my face against his chest. I was delivering the baby's today, I had to, or else, I could get very sick. I looked up at Colby and he looked down at me with concern. "Why are you crying?" He asked softly as he wiped my tears. "I....A living being died inside of me.......my baby......our baby.....died." I seen his face drop, sadness appeared in his eyes and he pulled me to his body.

"It's okay. Don't worry, I'm right here." He whispered. His voice cracked once or twice. We finished up showering and I got out and dried my hair and body. After everything was good, I slipped on the new gown and slowly made my way back to the bed. "Alexis, how you feeling?" Sam asked after I got out of the shower. "Better." Physically I felt better, emotionally I was breaking.

A nurse came in and smiled at me. I smiled back a fake smile as she did so. Colby looked over at her and then back at me. "Hi Alexis, we are going to induce you and then we will start the delivery, you may make a birth certificate if you would like." I looked at Colby and he nodded. "W...wait, do you know the gender?" I asked softly. Everyone looked at the Nurse. "The baby is a boy." She said. I smiled and looked at Colby. He smiled back. A transporter came in and took me out along with my Colby and my mom.

⚠️⚠️MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️⚠️

I was brought into a delivery room and they started inducing me, breaking my water. I was surprised and scared at first. I had to go through the process. And, I was scared to. Colby was right by my side the whole time. When it was time to actually give birth, I looked into Colby's eyes the whole time. He kissed me every now and then on the forehead. It took like an hour or so. I finally felt the pressure release and the doctor look at me. "Would you like me to clean him first?" He asked politely.

I looked at Colby and nodded my head. He nodded softly and walked out with the baby to go get cleaned and ready. I bit my lip and felt heavy pains in my chest. I was crying. Colby gripped my hand and kissed my knuckles. "I'm so sorry baby." He whispered. My mom came over to the other side of me and ran her fingers through my slightly sweaty hair. She kissed my temple and I watched as the doctor brought in my baby.

"Here He is." He said softly as he handed him to me first. I instantly broke and tears started flowing down my cheeks. I shook my head and breathed in deeply. I looked towards my mom and Colby. Tears running down their faces. The rest of the people came in. They sat me up better. "I'm so sorry...." I whisper and kissed his head. Every second I spent holding him, I fell more and more in love. Colby held his extremely small hand and I bit my lip holding in the loud sobs. "Colby Brock Jr." I said softly. Even though he was not fully him, he looked so much like Colby.

Colby looked at me surprised and smiled softly. "Colby Brock Jr." He said barely above a whisper. "Little one, I love you so much, mommy and daddy love you so much, sadly you had to go......I hope you know we never wanted you to go, but you will always be in our hearts....." I breathed in deeply as I spoke. Everyone in the room was crying. Everyone left leaving Colby and I alone with him. I couldn't hold him anymore. Colby was holding him, rocking back and forth talking to him.

I shook my head as my throat began to get really sore, my vision was blurred from the tears and I was breaking every second. A doctor brought in a carriage with blue blankets and a rabbit. We placed him in their and I was able to sit up. I wrapped my hand around his tiny one. He was so small and innocent. My sobs began to get louder and Colby pulled me to his chest as we both sobbed. "Our baby....he's gone, why...?" I said softly.

A doctor soon came in with some papers. "Would you like to sign the certificate now?" We nodded our heads and he brought over the piece of paper. We both signed it and they used ink to put his foot print on the paper. I soon stopped crying.......I was staring at my lifeless son. I almost felt lifeless too. We spent so long with him. "Would you like to have a funeral?" Colby asked quietly. "I looked up at him and nodded. "Yeah, I wanna give a proper goodbye." He hugged me and rubbed my back. I hugged back and just stared.

I almost felt numb. Like I was there but I wasn't. None of this seemed real and I just hope this is all a dream and when I wake up, I'll be in Hawaii again. I don't want this to be real. I don't want to experience this pain.....this heart shattering feeling that my own child died, a child I didn't even know I had, I could have prevented it. This is all my fault. I did this.