after meeting ruel at a concert, will brynne be able to lower her guard and get to know him? or will she over-think everything and allow her anxiety to prevent her from opening up?
HIGHEST RANK #7 in Ruel
i adjust my thick black belt in the mirror, which is draped with lush, green fake vines. i concentrate on my breathing, because i know if i don't i will end up having either a panic attack or a migraine. chill out brynne. i think to myself as i continue to adjust my outfit. i am wearing my absolute favourite thrifted striped pants, with a black crop and a blue denim jacket. my long blonde hair is styled wavily, and my bangs are loosely scattered upon my forehead. i have done my makeup so that it still looks reasonably natural, but not as glam as i would do it if i were going to a concert.
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i continue to adjust my outfit in the mirror, still not completely satisfied with how i look. i absolutely hate how much of a perfectionist i am; i wish that i could just go and have fun, but instead i am standing in front of my mirror with a mind overflowing with insecurities. i look at my phone, the time is 10:04am.
"SHIT" i yell to myself as i grab my purse, keys and phone and run out the door. i am meeting this ruel guy from the concert last night at glebe markets at 10:30am. and at this point i will definitely be late. i rush to the train station, which usually is a 20 minute walk. but today it takes me half the time because i absolutely sprint. i just make it to the station as a train is pulling up; i hastily tap my opal card and board at the carriage nearest to me. i climb the stairs to the upper level of the train and slump down into a seat, exhausted from running.
i then decide to message ruel to tell him that i'll most definitely be running a little late. it's about 10:15am now, and the train, bus and walk from central station will definitely take way longer than 15 minutes.
hey ruel, i'm running a bit late. shouldn't be there later than 10:45 i type. within a couple of minutes i get a response: no worries! see you there :) he says. i turn off my phone and stare out the window of the train, the adrenaline from the run to the station is dying down and butterflies are slowly replacing it. the nervous feeling envelopes me and i begin to feel sick in the stomach. i take a few deep breaths, shut my eyes and count slowly to ten. it doesn't make me feel completely better, but it calms me down a little bit. i honestly don't understand why meeting new people scares me so much. i used to be so outgoing when i was younger, i would talk to anyone and everyone, and starting conversations was never an issue.
now i overthink everything, and i find myself awkwardly creating silences that should be filled with conversation. but i guess if that's how it's going to be, there's no point in me trying to change anything. my thoughts are interrupted by the mechanical voice of the sydney train line telling me that the next station will be central. i get up from my seat and head towards the door of the train, ready to get off. not long after that, the train slows and i get off. i walk through the tunnels of the train station until i near the tunnel that leads to the bus stop where i need to catch my bus to glebe. i tap off my opal card, stop at the convenience store on the corner to buy some strawberry gum and throw my change to a man busking on my way out of the tunnel. i reach the bus stop, catch my bus and eventually end up standing at the rainbow fence of the glebe markets. it's about 10:42, so at least i didn't get here later than 10:45.
hey are u here? i message ruel. he opens straight away and responds with: yep! i'm just chillin on one of the silver seats next to the field he replies; the glebe markets are held every saturday at a public school in glebe, just inside the gates as you turn right there is a big field where the school kids have recess and lunch during the week. sure enough as i walk into the markets, i see ruel sitting on his phone on one of the seats behind the market stalls. he sees me coming and stands up. holy shit i did not remember him being so tall.
"hey brynne" he says with a slight smile to his tone.
"hey" i answer and smile. oh my god i am definitely going to ruin this. don't be awkward, don't be awkward; i repeat in my head over and over again like a mantra. "have you had a look at any of the stalls yet?" i ask him.
"yeah i have" he exclaims and pulls out a pair of socks with the characters from the avengers printed on them. "i got these for TWO DOLLARS" he adds.
"no way" i grab them from him and look at intricate design of iron man, captain america and spider man. i hand them back, he smiles at me in a sheepish manner. we continue to walk through the stalls. i stop and look at a few of the second hand stalls and find a super cute denim jacket with woollen fleece lining the inside.
"you should get it" ruel says. i stare at the jacket for a bit, considering whether or not i would wear it. the price marked on it is $20, for the markets that's a little bit excessive, but i guess the denim jacket would've been pretty expensive in the first place.
"okay i'll take it" i hand $20 over to the owner of the stall and ruel and i walk back towards the front gate.
"i think we've looked at everything" he says.
"yeah, i honestly don't think there's a piece of clothing we didn't look at" i laugh. ruel smiles at me, his eyes are oddly happy; in an immensely warm, welcoming kind of way.
"let's grab some lunch" he tells me.
"okay, sure" i reply. we walk towards the bus stop, and board a bus that is headed to newtown. as we're on the bus i finally build up the confidence to ask the question that i have been pining to ask him since literally the moment we got here. "so what's the deal with all of these 12 year olds harassing me on instagram?" i ask him jokingly. he laughs and shakes his head.
"they're my crazy-ass fans" he says with a smile. "i literally love them to bits and they make the coolest and funniest shit"
"damn please don't tell me you're a tiktok boy or some shit" i joke. ruel laughs, obnoxiously louder than before.
"i lowkey wish i could've said yes, purely because that would've been fucking funny; but no i actually sing" he tells me.
"what? no way" i say. "have you released any music?" i ask him.
"yeah i've released a couple of songs" he says. "but anyway, what about you?"
"what about me?" i ask him, confused.
"what's your favourite colour?" he asks me.
"baby blue" i answer.
"oh yeah nice" he replies.
"what about you?" i ask, to keep the conversation going.
"it is uh not your right to know that" ruel jokes. i look at him quizzically for a second but then we both break into a fit of laughter. as our bus pulls up to newtown, ruel jumps out of his seat and darts towards the door. "ladies first" he gestures towards the door.
"thank you" i laugh and i walk past him out of the bus. he smiles and as he does his eyes light up.
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i'll continue with the lunch next chapter hehe!
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ily all <3
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