Played Out

4. Lean On Me

Essence

"I guess it's my turn"

"If you want to I'm all ears"

I sighed while wrapped my arms around his leg. I tried not to squeeze like I did my pillow. I knew I need to talk to somebody and I didn't want to talk to anyone who knew everything. They all said the same things to me already. I felt like Pharaoh might have a different response. I felt like he was really trying to be my friend and I appreciate it.

"I've gotten use to my life not going good. Shit been fucked up for a while. But lately... I feel like the world is on my shoulders and I'm slowly breaking"

"What happen?"

"My mom... my mom died last spring" she sighed "It all happen so fast. She was sick for a minute then one day she was in a coma. A week later... everything stopped"

I knew he felt the tears that had slid onto his pants leg. I wiped my face and took a deep breath. I shook my head before letting him go and standing up. Before I could walk off though, he was standing pulling me into a hug. The hug was strong and protective. It reminded me of the last hug I gave my daddy. It was all I needed to breakdown.

I don't do all that extraness so I just softly cried in his chest. Once I called down he pulled me around the back toward the front but stopped at the Range Jeep at the top of the driveway. He open the trunk and told me to sit down before he went to the front of the car. He came back soon with another blunt and handed it to me with a lighter. I said fuck it and took it from him.

Once we smoke the second blunt I felt relaxed again. I leaned on him with my head on his arm/shoulder. I took a deep breath before speaking again.

"I didn't try to be mean when we first met yesterday"

He laughed "You weren't mean. Rude? Maybe"

"Shut up" I laughed with him "I'm serious"

"I am too. You weren't mean"

"I just don't like adding to my craziness. I gotta take care of me and my sisters while finishing school. When you was talking about getting to know me and shit, I just saw a nigga who wanted some ass trying to waste my time"

"Damn"
X
"Sorry" I smirked "But that's how I felt"

"No lie though you can't be assume shit about people. That's how you lose out on having good people in your life"

"So you good people?"

"Hell yeah" he laughed "The best actually. Plus I hear I give good advice. And my advice to you" he lifted my chin so I looked at him "Baby girl you gotta stop holding that shit in. I've seen depressed on its darkest day and the worst thing you can do is feed into it. You got 11 linesisters. And now you got me"

I shook my head laughing as I laid back on his shoulder. There was a comfortable silence between the two of us. I decided to check my phone for the first time since we started talking. Shocked was an understatement when I realized we had been out here talking for three hours.

"Damn we been out here forever" I giggled "Let me go get Gianni so I can go home"

"Shit they probably in there fucking or slump"

"Don't wish that on me"

"If they are you can sleep in my room. I can kick it on the floor for a night"

"Why not the couch?"

"I got my baby bro staying here for fall break while my parents went to visit my sister at Loyola"